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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 21:15:59 GMT -5
fisticuffs all the way
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 21:48:59 GMT -5
Here's the classroom scene
~~~~~
“Class, we have a new student today,” class 2-A’s teacher, Mr. Jenkins said. He was an elderly looking man, wrinkled and stooped with glasses three inches thick. He still possessed a full head of hair, which would have been impressive, if it were not completely gray. “Shaun Gendo. Say hello.”
“Hello,” the class responded half-heartedly. Shaun smiled; nobody returned the gesture. With a sigh he took one of the empty seats in the centre of the room, not far back enough where he could mull around and escape notice, but not close enough where he would be forced to feign absolute attentiveness. He was right in the middle of everyone. And that’s exactly how he felt as soon as his rump touched the seat. Everyone looked his way for a long moment before Mr. Jenkins began lecturing again.
Someone in NERVE must have leaked, he thought. They have to know I was the pilot of the automaton or else they wouldn’t even notice me. I wonder if they’re mad I destroyed part of the city?
He had every intention of listening to Mr. Jenkin’s lecture about the war, but the old bag was so dull that he ended up leaning his head on one hand and staring out the window. It was such a nice day and it seemed a shame to waste indoors. Since Second Impact, most days were nice and warm. The melting of the southern polar ice cap had altered the climate of the world – not too drastically beyond rising sea levels, but it did produce a nice warm climate nearly year-round for Great Britain.
That was something, at least, that the Martians could be thanked for. Winters now were short and mild. Shaun possessed only one or two memories of a real Earth winter, and they were awful. He enjoyed the warm climate. Many others though, scientists, ecologists, and religious organizations proclaimed it a horrendous blow to the world. The scientific viewpoint of it was that they had altered the Earth’s natural balance and thrown the world into chaos – as though it weren’t already. The religious stance was that Second Impact (as well as the Martians themselves) upset God’s plan, and that by doing so, they had angered Him.
Maybe that’s why He sent His Angels on us? Shaun joked morbidly. Come to think of it, what ARE the Angels? Why would NERVE name them after beings that are supposedly messengers of God? Shaun didn’t buy into the whole religion thing, which made him something of an oddity in the British Empire. Him and his father.
Hm? During his musings, it seemed someone had slipped a not onto his desk. He glanced around for any sign of who it might be, but the class seemed to be experts at maintain a poker face. After checking to make sure he wouldn’t be noticed by Mr. Jenkins – the old man was talking while facing the blackboard (Does he even know where he is?) – Shaun unfolded the note.
Are you the pilot of the automaton? Y/N?
Shaun sighed. They very fact that they even asked him probably meant that they already knew the answer. For such a secretive organization, NERVE’s security appeared to have been breached rather easily by some kids. He briefly considered answering no, but didn’t think it would do much good. It would only make them believe it more if he denied it, than if he owned up to it. Taking his pen, he circled Y, and wrote “Yes” underneath. No one seemed ready to pick up the message, so he folded it and placed it back on his desk. Soon his attention was once again captured by the outdoors.
“What?!” Suddenly the whole class was standing up in their seats and staring at him with incredulous looks on their faces. In the space of a few minutes, one note had circumnavigated the classroom, a feat even Magellan would have envied.
At the front of the class, Mr. Jenkins continued to lecture, now staring out the window.
~~~~~
writingn the fisticuffs now
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:12:13 GMT -5
cool
I'll edit once you post both.
good so far
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 22:22:21 GMT -5
“Hey, new kid!”
Shaun had been bum-rushed by the students after class, each shouting a dozen questions, all of them about the automaton. A couple he could answer - What was it called? How big was it? What weapons did it carry? – but most of the others were either classified or he simply didn’t know. It had taken fifteen minutes just to get from his desk to the front door.
“Hey!”
“I told you,” Shaun said without stopping. “I can’t answer any more questions about the Evangelion.” He thought he might leave him alone, but that fantasy was cut short by a hand spinning him violently around by the shoulder. It was a dark-haired boy who sounded like he was from America – Brooklyn, by his accent.
“That ain’t why I’m here, kid. You say you’re the pilot of that…thing what beat the Angel?”
“Uh, yes?” Hadn’t he covered this a dozen timed before?
“Thought so.” He gathered a fistful of Shaun’s uniform and pulled him close. “You know I oughta knock you out right now.”
“Why? What did I do?”
“Heh, what’d you do?” The boy cocked a grin and pulled back a fist, aimed directly at Thomas’ face. He couldn’t help but wince.
“Thomas! What are you doing?” Another boy ran up, this one sporting glasses and blond hair.
“Stay outta this Kenneth. This is between me and Shaun here.”
“But I didn’t do anything!”
“The hell you didn’t! Because of you, my little sister is in the hospital! That’s right,” he added seeing the shocked look on Shaun’s face. “While you were out screwing around, you stepped a house with my sister in it.”
“Is…is she okay?”
“Don’t pretend you care now, kid. It’s too late for – “
“I was only trying to help,” Shaun exclaimed. A fist slammed into the side of his face and he went down. Apparently satisfied, Thomas shoved his hands into his pockets and started away with Kenneth. “I did my best.”
Thomas spun around. “What did you say?”
“I said I did my best.” Shaun met Thomas’s stare. “I’m sorry she got hurt, but she’s alive, isn’t she? Without me to fight the Angel, she would have died along with the rest of this city.”
“Don’t you say that!” Thomas charged, but Shaun was already on his feet and dodged the strike. Thomas lashed out blindly, a wild swing that Shaun, with his limited fighting skills, easily avoided. He landed a solid, but weak, strike on Thomas. The other boy stumbled back more out of shock, than pain.
Shaun was visibly shaking, but determined to stand his ground. I don’t like fighting, but I’m not going to let anyone push me around.
“Right then,” Thomas remarked. He threw himself at Shaun, this time with more control. They sparred for a minute or two, Shaun managing to land a blow or two, but they didn’t seem to make any difference. By contrast, he moved slower with every hit from Thomas. Finally, Thomas got him in the gut, and then again on the side of the head, sending him to the ground. Shaun tasted blood in his mouth.
“Your best wasn’t enough to save my sister,” Thomas growled before kicking Shaun in the stomach. As he stalked away, victorious, Kenneth leaned over.
“Sorry about him. He’s just very protective of his sister.” He didn’t even offer to help Shaun up, he just dashed after Thomas.
Long after his wind had returned, and the bleeding stopped, Shaun lay in a heap. Even when trying to defend this city, I hurt people. Maybe my father was wrong. Maybe I can’t do this.
“Shaun.” Her voice made him jump. Rachel – still bandaged – stood over him. Her one good eye studied him with a cruel indifference. “We’re needed back at NERVE.”
“I don’t know if I can,” he whispered.
“I will help you then.” She reached down to pull him up.
“No that’s not – “ it was too late, Rachal had pulled Shaun to his feet.
“Can you walk?”
With a sigh, he said, “Yes.”
“Good. We are needed.” She took off running.
They need me. They need me. He spit the blood out of his mouth and went after her, holding onto the thought that someone needed him.
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:29:55 GMT -5
“Class, we have a new student today,” class 2-A’s teacher, Mr. Jenkins said. He was an elderly looking man, wrinkled and stooped with glasses three inches thick. He still possessed a full head of hair, which would have been impressive, if it were not completely gray. “Shaun Gendo. Say hello.”
“Hello,” the class responded half-heartedly. Shaun smiled; nobody returned the gesture. With a sigh he took one of the empty seats in the centre of the room, not far back enough where he could mull around and escape notice, but not close enough where he would be forced to feign absolute attentiveness. He was right in the middle of everyone. And that’s exactly how he felt as soon as his rump touched the seat. Everyone looked his way for a long moment before Mr. Jenkins began lecturing again.
Someone in NERVE must have leaked, he thought. They have to know I was the pilot of the automaton or else they wouldn’t even notice me. I wonder if they’re mad I destroyed part of the city?
He had every intention of listening to Mr. Jenkin’s lecture about the war, but the old bag was so dull that he ended up leaning his head on one hand and staring out the window. It was such a nice day and it seemed a shame to waste it indoors. Since Second Impact, most days were nice and warm. The melting of the southern polar ice cap had altered the climate of the world – not too drastically beyond rising sea levels, but it did produce a nice warm climate nearly year-round for Great Britain.
That was something, at least, that the Martians could be thanked for. Winters now were short and mild. Shaun possessed only one or two memories of a real Earth winter, and they were awful. He enjoyed the warm climate. Many others though, scientists, ecologists, and religious organizations proclaimed it a horrendous blow to the world. The scientific viewpoint of it was that they had altered the Earth’s natural balance and thrown the world into chaos – as though it weren’t already. The religious stance was that Second Impact (as well as the Martians themselves) upset God’s plan, and that by doing so, they had angered Him.
Maybe that’s why He sent His Angels on us? Shaun joked morbidly. Come to think of it, what ARE the Angels? Why would NERVE name them after beings that are supposedly messengers of God? Shaun didn’t buy into the whole religion thing, which made him something of an oddity in the British Empire. Him and his father.
Hm? During his musings, it seemed someone had slipped a not onto his desk. He glanced around for any sign of who it might be, but the class seemed to be experts at maintain a poker face. After checking to make sure he wouldn’t be noticed by Mr. Jenkins – the old man was talking while facing the blackboard (Does he even know where he is?) – Shaun unfolded the note.
Are you the pilot of the automaton? Y/N?
Shaun sighed. They very fact that they even asked him probably meant that they already knew the answer. For such a secretive organization, NERVE’s security appeared to have been breached rather easily by some kids. He briefly considered answering no, but didn’t think it would do much good. It would only make them believe it more if he denied it, than if he owned up to it. Taking his pen, he circled Y, and wrote “Yes” underneath. No one seemed ready to pick up the message, so he folded it and placed it back on his desk. Soon his attention was once again captured by the outdoors.
“What?!” Suddenly the whole class was standing up in their seats and staring at him with incredulous looks on their faces. In the space of a few minutes, one note had circumnavigated the classroom, a feat even Magellan would have envied.
At the front of the class, Mr. Jenkins continued to lecture, now staring out the window.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hey, new kid!”
Shaun had been bum-rushed by the students after class, each shouting a dozen questions, all of them about the automaton. A couple he could answer - What was it called? How big was it? What weapons did it carry? – but most of the others were either classified or he simply didn’t know. It had taken fifteen minutes just to get from his desk to the front door.
“Hey!”
“I told you,” Shaun said without stopping. “I can’t answer any more questions about the Evangelion.” He thought he might leave him alone, but that fantasy was cut short by a hand spinning him violently around by the shoulder. It was a dark-haired boy who sounded like he was from America – Brooklyn, by his accent.
“That ain’t why I’m here, kid. You say you’re the pilot of that…thing what beat the Angel?”
“Uh, yes?” Hadn’t he covered this a dozen timed before?
“Thought so.” He gathered a fistful of Shaun’s uniform and pulled him close. “You know I oughta knock you out right now.”
“Why? What did I do?”
“Heh, what’d you do?” The boy cocked a grin and pulled back a fist, aimed directly at Thomas’ face. He couldn’t help but wince.
“Thomas! What are you doing?” Another boy ran up, this one sporting glasses and blond hair.
“Stay outta this Kenneth. This is between me and Shaun here.”
“But I didn’t do anything!”
“The hell you didn’t! Because of you, my little sister is in the hospital! That’s right,” he added seeing the shocked look on Shaun’s face. “While you were out screwing around, you stepped a house with my sister in it.”
“Is…is she okay?”
“Don’t pretend you care now, kid. It’s too late for – “
“I was only trying to help,” Shaun exclaimed. A fist slammed into the side of his face and he went down. Apparently satisfied, Thomas shoved his hands into his pockets and started away with Kenneth. “I did my best.”
Thomas spun around. “What did you say?”
“I said I did my best.” Shaun met Thomas’s stare. “I’m sorry she got hurt, but she’s alive, isn’t she? Without me to fight the Angel, she would have died along with the rest of this city.”
“Don’t you say that!” Thomas charged, but Shaun was already on his feet and dodged the strike. Thomas lashed out blindly, a wild swing that Shaun, with his limited fighting skills, easily avoided. He landed a solid, but weak, strike on Thomas. The other boy stumbled back more out of shock, than pain.
Shaun was visibly shaking, but determined to stand his ground. "I don’t like fighting, but I’m not going to let anyone push me around."
“Right then,” Thomas remarked. He threw himself at Shaun, this time with more control. They sparred for a minute or two, Shaun managing to land a blow or two, but they didn’t seem to make any difference. By contrast, he moved slower with every hit from Thomas. Finally, Thomas got him in the gut, and then again on the side of the head, sending him to the ground. Shaun tasted blood in his mouth.
“Your best wasn’t enough to save my sister,” Thomas growled before kicking Shaun in the stomach. As he stalked away, victorious, Kenneth leaned over.
“Sorry about him. He’s just very protective of his sister.” He didn’t even offer to help Shaun up, he just dashed after Thomas.
Long after his wind had returned, and the bleeding stopped, Shaun lay in a heap. Even when trying to defend this city, I hurt people. Maybe my father was wrong. Maybe I can’t do this.
“Shaun.” Her voice made him jump. Rachel – still bandaged – stood over him. Her one good eye studied him with a cruel indifference. “We’re needed back at NERVE.”
“I don’t know if I can,” he whispered.
“I will help you then.” She reached down to pull him up.
“No that’s not – “ it was too late, Rachal had pulled Shaun to his feet.
“Can you walk?”
With a sigh, he said, “Yes.”
“Good. We are needed.” She took off running.
They need me. They need me. He spit the blood out of his mouth and went after her, holding onto the thought that someone needed him.
There.
Good stuff man.
Can't wait for the next chapter
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 22:31:39 GMT -5
Adam, any changes...make them to Derrick's copy. That way I can make sure I have the correctly edited version.
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:35:50 GMT -5
smart.
Whilst wondering about certain characters, I stumbled upon an idea concerning Bloody Mary.
Her Eva must be named Uncle Sam.
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 22:37:29 GMT -5
...ah...th...wh...hm...okay.
She pilots Provisional Unit-06, right?
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:39:47 GMT -5
Sure. But it'll be painted all red, white and blue, complete with throwing stars. (half kidding)
Who's soul should be in it? Should we just BS it and just say that it has no soul and Mary can pilot any evangelion so it doesn't matter who's soul is in it anyway?
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 22:42:36 GMT -5
We'll work on that. She comes in after Asuka (sorry, has to. We're already throwing Kawaru in at the Shamshel battle) Rachel - 00 Shaun - 01 Alice - 02  - 03 - 04 Klaus - 05 Mary - 06 Are we going to use units 03 and 04 at all? |
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:43:56 GMT -5
well just say that they're in storage/ destroyed.
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 22:47:57 GMT -5
Bardiel infect unit-04 in both the series, and Rebuild. We should keep it. Hell, we could even keep Unit-04 active if we felt like it.
Remember, this is an AU fic.
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 28, 2010 22:52:09 GMT -5
Well just have Mary pilot any of the other eva's.
How about 4 and 5 are specialized? 4's forte is close range combat with 5 being distance?
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 23:02:15 GMT -5
pull a Rebuild and throw more pilots in for no reason.
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 28, 2010 23:35:48 GMT -5
uploaded
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 29, 2010 8:46:40 GMT -5
cool
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 29, 2010 20:36:30 GMT -5
Alright.
Let's get movin'!
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 29, 2010 20:48:32 GMT -5
Is Kaworu Klaus impaling Shamshel the end of the chapter?
Because I was thinking of doing that, then pulling an NGE moment, where the next chapter begins after the battle and it goes on, (with Eva unit01 having been defeated) but the battle isn't shown until the end of that chapter.
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Post by TEAM_DERRICK on Jul 29, 2010 21:07:04 GMT -5
sorry it took me so long to reply, but sure.
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 29, 2010 21:09:55 GMT -5
Shamshel is impaled, explodes into LCL, Klaus is like "'Sup?"
~~~~~
On another note, wouldn't the Angel (being spawned from Adam) explode into something NOT LCL, which is Lilith's blood? ACL?
that's just me thinking too hard.
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- 03