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Post by Calefrun on May 8, 2013 2:13:43 GMT -5
For a brief instant, Cale actually considered chasing after Stella to try and stop her from wrecking the place. He wasn't sure if this was because of a sympathy for the princess, who clearly was not prepared for this level of... Stella-ishness, or if he was beginning to feel responsible for the actions of his party, but either way he quickly dismissed the idea, concluding that he would probably have a better chance of becoming the king of this place than being able to stop Stella, and even if he could, there was still Goldbez to deal with. So rather than acting on impulse and actually doing something worth posting about, he just muttered, "I'm so sorry..." and followed Sarah.
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Post by Sariel of Tevet on May 8, 2013 14:42:58 GMT -5
Professor Calamitous stroked his skeleton chin as if there were some sort of imaginary beard there and stared at the gyrating mass of testosterone that is GOLDBEZ destroying (or possibly improving) the palace.
"Hmmm. What a dazzling display of evil! Such hip swiveling debauchery must leave the ladies stupefied and utterly defenseless, such sexual brainwashing must be pure evil!! That's it. I have made up my mind. No more Mr. semi-evil Papa Pikachu! I shall gyrate my way to madness!"
He placed his skeleton hands behind his head, stuck out his pelvis, and smirked "Watch out princess. I'm single, a genius, and my exoskeleton gives me super human abilities, and that doesn't exclude the bedroom," He heavily winked in her direction, even though he was pretty sure at this moment she was leaving the room with most of the party following suit. Then he came to the sudden realization that, being only a skeleton with a brain and heart, he had no genitalia. Naturally, he resolved to gyrate at 200% effectiveness to overcompensate for the missing manhood.
"Exoskeleton! Gyrate at 200% power!"
His hips began to swivel uncontrollably, and drug him around the room, farther away from the princess and the rest of the group.
"No! No the other way you damned machine! Follow them that way!"
He began to thrust and dance in the direction of everyone else, crashing through entire walls until he caught up to the group and in front of the princess, still gyrating.
"Hello milady, I'll have you know I am in peak physical and masculine conditioning! Fall under my newly evil gyration spell! Oh and by the way, I'm not anorexic, I'm just a skeleton." He followed that with another wink.
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Post by Monika on May 14, 2013 1:36:05 GMT -5
"Oh dear..." Chancellor Awesome shook his head and followed closely behind Sarah. He glanced at Cale and silently agreed. At this point, a measly 'I'm sorry' is all either of us could muster, it seems. Alas, if only this were Awesome Land. I could use my full power to straighten those miscreants out, all while avoiding damaging the palace... In his mind, however, C. Awesome knew that their returning to Awesome Land (and his using magic to control the likes of the rambunctious Stella or GOLDBEZ) was impossible, so he dismissed the thought from his head and uttered "I'm so sorry..." as well.
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Post by Mizagium on May 14, 2013 1:48:36 GMT -5
It's fine," Sarah replied through clenched teeth. "Right this way, Chancellor. Cale. Anyone else." Sarah lead them into the palace and to the drawing room. She still didn't feel comfortable sitting in her mother's (or father's) throne while they were away. She was still the princess, not the queen. Some servants provided refreshments and Sarah composed herself.
"Now," she began, noticeably calmer although she could hear crashes and shouts from various corners of the palace. "Obviously I'm not going to hand over the True Sword. All of the Artifacts have been sealed away in the Vault. Luckily Johnny didn't take it with him, or else you'd have to go traipsing about Random World looking for that stubborn boy and his fire goddess...anyway. There has to be another way to solve this? Can't you simply beat this William into a pulp like we do all our other problems?" She casually sipped her tea like there was nothing wrong with that statement.
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Post by Monika on May 14, 2013 2:07:11 GMT -5
"Erm, well, while I would love to resolve our problem in such an uncivilized way-" Chancellor Awesome cleared his throat nervously, not quite sure he had heard the princess correctly. I guess being near Awesome Land this long would drive anyone to a rash decision... he mused. "-William is a very dangerous and powerful individual. From what I've gathered, he has discovered a way to banish people to the Veral Dimension and - once it is completely consumed - he will have the power to banish people to the Null-Void." The Chancellor spoke softly here; he had heard from Aurora (she had given all her subjects a lengthy "Things My Brother Did Wrong" book) the crimes Leon had committed during his stint as Emperor, including imprisoning Sarah in the Null-Void. In an attempt to avoid lingering on what might be a painful topic, C. Awesome hastily switched the subject. "Additionally, the COMAS organization is like a cult. They will do anything William commands without hesitation. They are quite dangerous in their own right - each one is an expert mage. But add in their fanatical devotion to their leader and..." C. Awesome trailed off, not wanting to entertain the prospect of another war.
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Post by Mizagium on May 15, 2013 1:38:10 GMT -5
"That is a problem..." Sarah steepled her fingers. "Perhaps we can work something out. I have a...problem that needs handling. It seems some Xavian cultists have been spotted lurking around in the Great Southern Forest. While I didn't think anything of it before, it occurs to me that they may be searching for the Scroll of Science that Really Cool Land is said to possess." She sipped her drink. "They've been harassing the Antler-men and I've received a request for aid today. Perhaps you should take your party there, assist the Antler-men, retrieve a Scroll of Science along the way, and by the time you return, I should have a plan worked out.
"Were my parents here, I would be going myself. And since Cassandra and my idiot brother are off...we don't have any heroes. Which reminds me, if you see Cassandra out there, tell her that Vespi's moving in on her man. Tell me what she says. They had a fight a couple of days ago and I want to know how pissed she still is."
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Post by Calefrun on May 16, 2013 21:53:35 GMT -5
Cale smiled. Fighting cultists for a princess was closer to what he had in mind when he had wished for adventure. He was still banished from his homeland and stuck with this group, but at least he finally had the chance to do something heroic. He began to move towards the room's exit, and he said to Sarah, "If there's anything else you need to tell us, fill in the Chancellor; I'm going to go try and collect the rest of our party. I get the feeling that you would prefer to have us out of your castle as quickly as possible."
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Post by Myrdraxxis on May 16, 2013 22:05:55 GMT -5
Azzi rubbed his hands together excitedly. "Cool!" Fighting cultists was fun. He hadn't fought any cultists since that Xavian insurrectionist group a few years ago that almost assassinated the royal family. Almost being the key word. The vampire-ninja clan had put a stop to it right quick.
But no one had ever thanked them for that.
In fact, Azzi was pretty sure that his people were the only ones who even knew that it was happening. Ah well. The life of a ninja.
"The only thing that could make this better would be a sandwi-" Suddenly there was a rather delectable turkey sandwich in his hands as a figure blurred through the room and out of sight. "....thanks mom!" he hollered in a random direction.
The members of Team Zais had all gone rigid the minute they heard the word Xavian. Sindri's brain was working furiously trying to keep himself from exploding in righteous anger at the cultists (for the moment at least) and deciding if he should tell Zais.
'On the one hand, I could let him know of this development and call for aid. We could use some reinforcements. On the other hand...Zais would probably flood the forest with troops. Or just flood the forest.'
He'd wait and see how things went from here.
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Post by Mizagium on May 17, 2013 0:37:49 GMT -5
GOLDBEZ HAD SOMEHOW FOUND HIS WAY INTO THE KITCHEN AND WAS BUSY PUNCHING HIS WAY THROUGH SERVERAL LAYERS OF THE FOOD PYRAMID.
“WHAT IS THIS? FOOD? I DIDN’T COME HERE TO HAVE MY APPETITE SATED—I CAME HERE TO GET DRUNK!”
“Sir,” one of the chefs, a woman in her early thirties said rather dully, “I keep telling you, we don’t keep our wine here. We have a cellar for that. If you would follow me, I would be happy to show you to the—“
“DON’T TRY YOUR FANCY DOUBLE-TALK ON ME, LADY! MY NAME IS GOLDBEZ. I ONCE GYRATED SO GOOD I CAUSED A BAR TO DISAPPEAR!”
“I know.” She gritted her teeth. “You’ve told us several times.”
“WHAT’S THAT? YOU LOOKING FOR A RIDE ON THE GOLD-TRAIN?”
“No, I—what?”
“C’MERE, BABY!” GOLDBEZ BEGAN TO SWING HIS PELVIS AROUND. THOSE HIPS DON’T LIE, HE GOT THE MOVES LIKE JAGER. SIMPLY DOING SO CAUSED SEVERAL WINDOWS TO SHATTER AND THE MILK TO SPOIL. ALL THE CHEFS FLED IN TERROR AS HE MOVED TO AN UNHEARD RHYTHM, SPREADING MISERY AND WOE WHEREVER HE DANCED.
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Post by Calefrun on May 17, 2013 1:13:54 GMT -5
At that moment, Cale entered the kitchen. Seeing GOLDBEZ, he immediately became furious. The trip to the Imperial Tower in Dynasty City had been the first time that he had entered royal living space, but he was fairly certain that gyrating in the kitchen was entirely inappropriate.
"GOLDBEZ!" he shouted, "YOU CAN'T JUST DO THIS TO SOMEONE'S KITCHEN! THIS IS SOME SERIOUS BULLSHIT!" He slowly walked over to one of the kitchen's sinks, and reached into his left jacket pocket. From it, he withdrew a small packet which contained a small amount of the powder that Xanthos had given him. "I've been saving this for just such an occasion..." Indeed, on the side of the packet were the words: Use if some giant, golden, gyrating ass-hat starts destroying the kitchen of an exasperated princess (It was written in very tiny font).
Cale opened the packet, and emptied its contents into his hand. He then poured a small amount of the water from the sink onto it, after which it went through the same transformation it did on page 12, changing into a bubbly liquid. Cale drank the liquid, and instantly he felt a familiar change. As the power started to course through his body, his silver hair began to stand on end, and the boy's muscles bulged considerably. He drew his swords, and pointed one at GOLDBEZ. "I'd urge you to stop before this turned violent," he said with a more serious look than his normal one, "but I'd be willing to bet you'd prefer things this way. Am I correct?"
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Post by Mizagium on May 17, 2013 1:31:38 GMT -5
"WHAT'S THAT, LITTLE MAN?" GOLDBEZ HELD HIS ARMORED HAND TO WHERE HIS EAR SHOULD BE. "IS IT GO TIME?" HE DID SO WHILE CONTINUING TO SWING HIS HIPS AROUND LIKE A COLUMBIAN PROSTITUTE.
"SOUNDS LIKE YOU WANT TO DANCE. I SHOULD WARN YOU, I HAVE BEEN DANCING MY ENTIRE LIFE. THEY SAY I DID THE HARLEM SHAKE WHEN I WAS BORN." HE PUNCTUATED HIS SENTENCE BY THRUSTING TO ONE SIDE.
"Oh my god!" shouted a maid who happened to walk by. "I think I'm pregnant now!"
"YOU MIGHT WANNA GET THAT CHECKED OUT, SWEETIE. LAST TIME THAT HAPPENED, THE GYNECOLOGIST HAD TO CALL IN A TEAM OF EXORCISTS." The maid ran away crying. "SHE'LL COME BACK. THEY ALWAYS COME BACK FOR MORE OF THIS SWEET, SWEET CANDY!"
GOLDBEZ RAISED HIS HANDS IN THE AIR BECAUSE HE DIDN'T GIVE TWO FIZZES AND STARTED DOING SOMETHING LIKE A FOXTROT. "MY SIMILARLY ARMORED BROTHER ONCE TOLD ME I HAD TO STOP DANCING BECAUSE I ACCIDENTALLY EXPLODED THE SCHOOL--TOLD ME I NEEDED TO FIND SOME GODS, STOP BELIEVING IN THEM, THEN GO FIGHT FOR THEM, BUT I SAID THAT MUST DANCE AND WALTZED ON OUT OF THAT HOLE." HE TOOK A FEW STEPS TOWARDS CALE, TURNING THE WATER IN THE SINK TO WINE. BAD WINE, BUT WINE. "LET ME SHOW YOU THE DANCE OF MY PEOPLE."
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Post by Calefrun on May 17, 2013 1:49:54 GMT -5
"Wait," Cale said, and he slowly raised his arm, pointing the sword that he had been directing at GOLDBEZ instead towards the ceiling. The blade suddenly glowed with a blinding light, and a beam of energy shot from it, destroying everything in its path and leaving a large hole which went all the way through the roof of the palace. "I hate to destroy so much of this place..." he abruptly disappeared and instantly reappeared behind GOLDBEZ. Struggling for a moment against the vibrations of his gyrations, Cale managed to grab the armored man, and proceeded to lift him, and finally throw him through the hole, up high into the air. He leaped after his frienemy, and upon reaching him at the peak of his ascent said, "...but if we did this in there, I doubt anything would be left standing." With that, he delivered a midair roundhouse kick which sent GOLDBEZ flying into a field a couple of miles away.
Cale fired another blast in the opposite direction which sent him flying after GOLDBEZ. Once he landed, he faced GOLDBEZ and said, "Now we dance."
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Post by Mizagium on May 17, 2013 13:22:24 GMT -5
"FOOLISH BOY, YOU KNOW NOTHING OF THE DANCE."
GOLDBEZ PUT HIS HANDS TO HIS HEAD AND MADE HORNS, THEN THE LOWERED HIS HEAD AND SNORTED LIKE A BULL. "DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO GRAB THE BULL BY THE HORNS?" HE STAMPED HIS FOOT. THEN HE RAN. HE COLLIDED WITH CALE, HEADFIRST INTO HIS OVERLY MUSCULAR ABDOMEN. HE DIDN'T STOP. HE CARRIED CALE ALL THE WAY TO THE OCEAN, THEN HE KEPT RUNNING.
"OH YEAH. BRING THE HEAT!" ONCE HE WAS FAR ENOUGH FROM LAND, GOLDBEZ STOPPED RUNNING AND JUMPED STRAIGHT UP INTO THE AIR, TAKING CALE WITH HIM. "MY TURN!" ONCE HE WAS 9001 FEET UP, HE GRABBED CALE BY THE FOOT, SWUNG HIM AROUND, THEN HURLED HIM INTO THE OCEAN.
"HAHAHAHAHA!" HE LAUGHED, STAYING IN THE AIR. "YOUR DANCE IS WEAK, CALE." THEN HE DID LITTLE JIG AND CREATED A MAELSTROM.
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Post by Calefrun on May 17, 2013 16:36:07 GMT -5
Seconds after submerging, Cale burst from the center of the maelstrom, which followed him and inverted upon itself as he flew into the air. He extended his swords before him and struck GOLDBEZ with the force of the gravity-defying maelstrom, which interupted the golden man's dance and sent him flying even farther up into the air. Floating where GOLDBEZ had been and with the upside-down maelstrom still twisting around his waist, Cale fired a flurry of blasts of energy, and those that hit their target consequently exploded.
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Post by Monika on May 17, 2013 16:49:47 GMT -5
"Yes, ahem." Chancellor Awesome stood up and gave a slight bow, nodding in acknowledgment of his mission. She is still quite young, gossiping about her subjects... he mused. She is probably much more well suited to the life of an adventurer than to that of a ruler. "Very well, Princess. I shall hunt down this Scroll of Science and do what I can to remedy the Xavian cultist situation." Sighing, he added "And I will be sure to keep an eye out for this Cassandra and let you know how she feels."
Just as he was about to leave, Chancellor Awesome couldn't help but hear a loud series of crashes from somewhere in the palace. Then the sounds faded away, as if they were moving into the distance. "Oh, dear. Pardon me for the abrupt departure, but I believe some of our party members are wreaking havoc on your country. I must tend to the matter before any more trouble is caused. Farewell, Princess Sarah." Bowing once more, Chancellor Awesome ran as quickly as he could out of the palace and toward the source of the noises. Sure enough, there stood/flew/swam GOLDBEZ and what appeared to be a Super Saiyan Cale.
"For the love of Seraphina..." Chancellor Awesome waved at the two combatants, signaling them to stop.
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Post by Mizagium on May 17, 2013 23:14:30 GMT -5
GOLDBEZ SHRUGGED OFF THE ENERGY ATTACKS, BUT NOT WITHOUT TAKING A FEW POINTS OF DAMAGE. "SO IT'S GOING TO BE THAT KIND OF BATTLE, IS IT?" GOLDBEZ THRUST OUR HIS HANDS, FINGERS SPREAD AND REACHING FOR SOMETHING IN THE AIR. HE TIGHTENED THEM, GRIPPING SOME UNSEEN OBJECT. LIGHTNING CRACKLED IN HIS HANDS AND THE SKY DARKENED. LONG ARCS OF LIGHTNING SPLIT THE SKY AND REACHED DOWN TO ANSWER THE SUMMONS OF THE MIGHTY GOLDBEZ.
"HERE WE GO, BABY!" KEEPING HIS UPPER HALF STABLE, GOLDBEZ'S WAIST AND LEGS BEGAN TO GO THROUGH THE MOTIONS OF A SALSA DANCE. THE WIND HOWLED AND SPAWNED A TEAM OF WATER SPOUTS, WHICH PROMPTLY BEGAN TO DANCE WITH EACH OTHER. ENERGY COLLECTED IN HIS HAND. HE PULLED THEM APART LIKE HE WAS SIFTING THROUGH PARTICULARLY STIFF TAFFY.
"CHECK IT OUT, ZEUS!" HE SHOUTED AT THE WORLD. "YOU'RE NOT SO SPECIAL, AFTER ALL HUH?"
GRASPING THE CONDENSED LIGHTNING IN ONE EACH HAND, GOLDBEZ JUMPED UP HIGHER, DID A BACKFLIP, SO THAT HE FACED DOWNWARD, AND FLEW RIGHT AT CALE, CRASHING THROUGH HIS ENERGY BARRAGE. BELOW HIM, THE WATER SPOUTS DANCED FASTER AND FASTER, FRANTICALLY, EROTICALLY. THE LIGHTING ARCS FORMED ENTIRE SCENES IN THE AIR, MOSTLY PICTURES OF GOLDBEZ IN VARIOUS MASCULINE POSES.
"GOLDEN! DOUBLE LIGHTNING. FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIST!"
HE COLLIDED WITH CALE'S PUNY HUMAN FORM.
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Post by Sariel of Tevet on May 19, 2013 1:17:13 GMT -5
Professor Calamitous ceased his useless attempt at gyration, no one had been watching him anyway and his apparent plan to bed the princess had failed miserably. Chancellor Awesome had left the room to chase after whatever had caused the catastrophe, presumably GOLDBEZ because he seemed to be quite the loose cannon.
Professor Calamitous swaggered over to the princess, being sure to add maximum swivel to his exo-hips, and then took her hand in his own and bowed.
"Forgive my destructive nature my dear, I am attempting to become evil afterall. Alas, my heart is just to great some times and my goodness takes over." He pointed at his exposed heart, just to make sure she noticed how enormous and spectacular it was. "Perhaps you may want to become evil one day and steal it from me, metaphorically of course, as I do need it to live and that would be counterproductive for our intended relationship for me to die. I must be following the rest of my party, however," He put her hand to his uh...skeleton teeth I suppose, he has no lips, but he went through the ritual of kissing her hand,"I shall return for you once we put down these cultists and obtain your scrolly thing."
And with that, he ran outside and jumped all the way to the ocean at the side of Chancellor Awesome, in a single bound, and landed on an incredibly hard object. He bend down and began to dig away the sand in the beach and uncovered a soccer ball sized orange orb with seven red stars on it. "Uh...Well that's weird, and probably useless. There are atleast six more others of these, so why would anyone even look for this silly thing?" He tossed the orb over his shoulder and watched Cale and GOLDBEZ fight.
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Post by Monika on May 19, 2013 13:21:24 GMT -5
Pressing a large, heavily armored palm against his helmet, Chancellor Awesome snatched his patented Mirror Shield from its slot on his back and held it threateningly toward GOLDBEZ and Cale. "Both of you shall cease this instant! On behalf of both Her Imperial Majesty, Aurora of Awesome Land and Her Royal Majesty, Sarah of Really Cool Land, I shan't allow either of you to wreak havoc on this country anymore!"
The highly reflective surface of the Mirror Shield showed a crystal clear replica of GOLDBEZ crashing into Cale. Slowly, however, the image began to twist and distort until it showed neither GOLDBEZ nor Cale - no, this image was far more terrifying. This was now an image of the legendarily frightening enemy of mankind: The Perverted Fat Guy. The image of the PFG stared intently at Cale and GOLDBEZ, and his tongue pressed against the shield's glass, smearing it from the other side. Opening his mouth as far as possible, the PFG's image inhaled deeply; the inhalation was powerful enough to break through the impenetrable nature of the Mirror Shield and affect things in the real world (such as the location of Chancellor Awesome's problem). The stream of air was so powerful that it pulled Cale and GOLDBEZ from the ocean straight into the Mirror Shield.
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Inside the Mirror Shield
Cale and GOLDBEZ landed in some...area. It was very hellish location, wherever they were - like someone was on a really bad acid trip. Bright shades of orange and green and yellow swirled about the locale - colors that sounded like soul shattering screams and smelled like a mixture of miasma and fear. It was all sorts of crazy inside Chancellor Awesome's shield. The sound of a thousand creatures scuttling across the ground (was there ground? Was there a ceiling?) added to the insanity-inducing imagery, and it was enough to drive any normal person to the brink of despair. But GOLDBEZ and Cale weren't by any means normal, so the chancellor thought it was a perfectly acceptable place from which he could speak with them.
"NOW!" His voice resonated throughout the...walls of this mystery dimension. "WHILE YOU TWO ARE OFF HERE SQUABBLING, AWESOME LAND AND THE SURROUNDING COUNTRIES ARE IN DANGER! XAVIAN CULTISTS THREATEN THIS KINGDOM, AND THE ENTIRE PLANET IS BOUND TO BE CONSUMED BY A BLACK HOLE IF WE DON'T GET THE SCROLLS OF SCIENCE!"
As Chancellor Awesome spoke, the colors of the location slowly morphed from bright, almost-happy colors to unsettling shades of red. If one were to feel the color, it would seem to be viscous and sticky, kind of like blood.
"AND LET ME TELL YOU BOTH!" he added. "ALL THE GYRATION AND MOUNTAIN DEW IN THE WORLD CANNOT STOP A BLACK HOLE! NOW, WE'RE GOING TO THE SOUTHERN FORESTS AND WE'RE GOING TO GET THE NEXT SCROLL OF SCIENCE! NO MORE OF THIS SENSELESS FIGHTING!"
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Back outside in the REAL WORLD
"Come, Professor!" Chancellor Awesome addressed Professor Calamitous, who seemed (oddly enough) to be the least bothersome of the group. "We are going south of here, to the forest. We have a mission to complete." Without another word, the chancellor began to jog to the south (still carrying Cale and GOLDBEZ in the shield), eager to complete their journey and, you know, save the world.
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Post by Myrdraxxis on May 19, 2013 17:25:43 GMT -5
"I think we just got left behind." Azzi said to the members of Team Zais, who were all still staring at the site of GOLDEBZ's and Cale's battle with a look of silent horror and awe.
"We...we should go after them." Gree said after a moment. The other members of Havoc squad nodded. Sindri sighed heavily.
"I guess we can report all of this to lord Zais later. Onward!"
Without waiting for the instruction (which would have never come had Sindri anything to say about it) Mistah Jangles scooped up the group in his arms and charged after Chancellor Awesome with a loud roar. Azzi ninja-hopped on the daemon's back, ignoring the panicked shouts from Team Zais.
Mistah Jangles ran. And ran. Until he actually passed Chancellor Awesome and Professor Calamitous and kept right on going.
Soon the daemon had run to the forest and dropped Team Zais to the ground in a heap. Sindri pulled himself up, groaning.
"Okay, so we're here. Apparently ahead of the others."
"We could scout around for a bit." Havoc Squad's sergeant Niner offered. Sindri grunted an affirmative and the squad spread out. After a moment, the silence was broken by Azzi.
"Hey guys..."
"Not now, we're trying to look for the cultists."
"Yeah but guys-"
"We need to focus here!"
"I found them."
Collectively Team Zais turned around and looked at Azzi.....who was surrounded by a group of rather aggressive-looking Xavian cultists.
"Good work." Sindri congratulated. The cultiss charged and the fight began.
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Post by Sariel of Tevet on May 19, 2013 23:17:19 GMT -5
Professor Calamitous was stopped in his tracks by the wooshing by of Mistah Jangles and the muffled screams of the rest of the group. "Shrieks and shrills of horror! I like it! Truly it is an evil form of transportation to travel that quickly to our destination. I must follow suit! Exoskeleton skeleton legs go!"
He squatted until he was nearly seated on the ground, and sprung himself into the sky and over the country side where he could still see the trail that Mistuh Jangles left behind him until he found the group had stopped miles away. Somehow Professor Calamitous was conveniently able to control when gravity began to force him to fall (science magic!) and he plummeted towards the earth and came crashing down on top of what appeared to be a cultist and almost killing him.
He stood up and looked down upon his spoils of war and smiled a brilliant skeleton smile.
"I suppose you could say, I really fell for him."
He looked around and saw that the group was now surrounded by a large group of cultists that seemed to be quite aggressive, seeing as how they were now fighting with Team Zais and the rest.
"Did you lads know that the human body potentially produces 11,000 watts of electricity an hour?"
He lowered the funnel to his science shooter and pressed it against the chest of the dying cultist.
"That seems like quite a bit of energy doesn't it? Let's see how much damage this young man will do."
His science shooter fizzed and steamed as the vortex within the gun began to molecularly deconstruct the cultist and consume him and reassemble him into charged ammunition. He aimed his atomic blunderbuss at a group of cultists fired. The blast tore away at the group and sent them flying into the background, which inadvertently sent a small portion of Team Zais with them.
"Uh...oops. Sorry lads. All things considered, that was quite fantastic. I should consume people more often, they pack quite a punch. Although I believe friendly fire DOES fall under the jurisdiction of evil. Mwah ha ha ha..sfklj *cough* *cough*. Er..excuse me." He cleared his throat, somehow. "I haven't quite gotten down the evil laugh."
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