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Post by Mizagium on Apr 1, 2015 10:02:12 GMT -5
“The plan,” Jeff said slowly, turning from Sarina to Ash to Dorrei, “is to find Khilbron, who should be able to take us where we need to go.”
Vi’ir snorted. “Oh well brilliant.”
“Look, kid,” Jeff began and trailed off. He had to admit it wasn’t a very good plan. But it was something. “Look. I know where Khilbron was going before he…disappeared. He probably ran into some trouble and lost contact.” As likely as that was. “So we need to get there.” Boy that sounded stupider than he meant.
Apparently, Vi’ir thought so, too. Even so, the ten year old sighed. “Ok. Let’s get going, then.” He stepped out of the barrier Jeff had created, scanned the area for more anime mammoths, and thrust out his hand. “Summon: Cyclaeon Multi!” A brief light show followed. When it died down, a bunch of shimmering crystals hovered in the air before him, one for everybody gathered.
“Everybody take on,” he said. He took one to demonstrate. Once his hand closed around it, more light emanated from the crystal, but instead of spreading out, it pooled beside him, and crystallized into something that looked like a motorcycle, except child-sized, and featuring what appeared to be a face. “They’re sentient, sort of,” he explained while mounting. “So Jeff can just tell his where to go and it should go.” After a moment, he added, “Oh and they can, like transform or something.”
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Post by Monika on Apr 4, 2015 19:18:09 GMT -5
"Try not to lead us astray, Jeff. Seems like the rest of our group might be getting tired of aimless wandering," Sarina said, walking up to Vi'ir. "Though I wouldn't really mind it if we got to wander aimlessly on motorcycles," she added. Grabbing one of the crystals Vi'ir had summoned, Sarina did exactly as he did and watched as light poured forth from her hand and formed into a motorcycle. Hers was adult-sized, of course, and seemed vaguely draconic in appearance.
"This is pretty neat." Sarina hopped on the bike without hesitation, finding it surprisingly comfortable. "I'm glad this thing only looks like a dragon, though. Raine would kill me if she found out I was riding another dragon behind her back..." After a quick sigh and some brief reminiscing, Sarina nodded toward the rest of the party. "Ready when you guys are."
Community replaced her butterfly net and nodded to Twisted Gambit. I don't really have much of a choice here, she thought. My invincibility will wear off in a matter of minutes, and I'm going to run through my entire deck at this rate. These guys are decent matches, for copycats.
"Fine. I'm willing to talk to you, but there is no miscommunication," Community began. "Sealing powers inside cards and wielding them in battle is, as I'm sure you know, an extremely unconventional fighting style. One for which my family owns several patents, trademarks, and copyrights. Under current international intellectual property law, you all are forbidden from making, using, selling, or offering for sale these card-based powers." Her speech was swift and indifferent, having been rehearsed countless times before. She shrugged. "That's really all there is to it. As heir to the family, I'm supposed to enforce our IP rights."
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Post by Myrdraxxis on May 23, 2015 21:08:24 GMT -5
The Archmage chuckled at Sam's attack...for a moment. Then that chuckle turned into an uncomfortable grunt. Which quickly became a pained scream as the spell took effect.
"What-"
The Archmage gasped and dropped to his knees. "How did you..."
In his desperation the Archmage mentally reached out. Not to his opponents, but further away. Across planes of existence. It was an often unused line of communication; the Archmage's creator often left maters up this his judgement.
'Master!' he called out.
A long, agonizing moment later, a voice responded.
'Huh? Wha-oh! Yo what's up?'
'Lord Zais I need help!' The Archmage pleaded.
"oooh, yeahhh. See thing is I'm kinda busy at the moment.' Came Zais' reply, punctuated by a loud slurping sound. Clearly the sound of Zais drinking something. 'Man, this ship really has a neat food court...'
{i]'But...'[/i] The Archmage gasped and looked down. He was literally beginning to dissolve.
"Hmm? What's that?' Zais began making very obviously fake static noises. 'You're breaking up. Can't-crsshhhshs-hear-shshshshshchc-saying.'
Zais' obnoxious static noises were the last things the Archmage heard as the spell completely unmade him.
One world over Zais, sitting witha tray of fast food in the SS Underboob's food court, sighed in relief. "Man, that guy was annoying." With that, he went back to his cheeseburger.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"He's stabilized." Septimus gasped, leaning back from Ash. Sure enough, Ash looked a great deal better, and the dark matter had halted its journey across his body. "I couldn't remove it but...it shouldn't go any further, and it won't kill him."
Magnus nodded, letting out a small sigh of relief. "Nice."
"So...we should get going then." Leske eyed the motorbikes that had suddenly appeared.
"Right." Magnus leaned down and hefted Ash up. THe man groaned for a moment and opened his eyes blearily.
"What the-"
"Easy there. We need to get moving." Magnus cut him off. He approached one of the bikes and hummed thoughtfully. "Nice but..perhaps something a bit more..." Magnus reached out and laid a hand on the bike. Its form shimmered and changed until, rather than a motorcycle, it was now a rather expensive-looking car.
"Lay Ash in the back." Magnus told Leske and Desmond.
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Post by Mizagium on Jun 7, 2015 16:16:45 GMT -5
Samantha sighed in relief when the Archmage dissipated. Then she quickly deactivated her TUCAN and MANHANDS and shoved them back into her bag. Her head began to throb. Using her devices like that always gave her a headache – and they were getting more frequent. And worse. She swore under her breath, remembering that her medicine was back in her private lab. But she couldn’t risk heading back there right now.
She tried to take a step, wobbled, and fell against Zento. “Ok…squid boy. I need to lean on you…for a bit. Can you get us…back to the others?” She could walk, she knew, but it was tough to concentrate on standing upright. “I’ll be fine…in a little bit,” she assured him.
-
Twisted Gambit crossed his arms and leaned against a rock. “I suppose I can respect standing up for your family name and whatnot,” he said to Community. “But I’m afraid you must be mistaken. You see, this here card-sealing technique” he patted the deck on his belt “has been in my family for generations. Ever since we came from…well, ever since we set up in Wessos. Been in the…the family for hundreds of years.” He absently thumbed his hat. Almost gave away more about he’d have liked.
-
Gale recovered from the Death Manmoth’s swipe and returned triumphantly, brandishing what appeared to be a sword made of compressed air. “I trained in the mountains for fifteen years to defeat you!”
Grimmtusk snarled. “Fine, little man, en garde!” His huge anime sword came down with the sound of thunder crashing, but caught just fine on Gale’s air sword.
“You won’t defeat me, large, hairy man! I have the strength of my friends behind me!” An uncomfortable moment passed and Gale glanced back towards where they all took cover. “I said, ‘I have the strength of my friends behind me’!”
“Yeah, we heard you!” Vespi returned. “Saying it twice isn’t going to make it any more or less true!”
“We really should help him,” Bill conceded. He, of course, also hadn’t moved from cover. From their un-heroic position they heard the sounds of swords clashing as Gale and Grimmtusk engaged in what was probably a really awesome fight, but we aren’t going to talk about that right now.
“I say we should leave.” Gallen Kah had somehow come to join to other two Immortals behind a crate of pornography imported from Sexy Land. For morale. “Let’s just go back home. He can’t follow us there.”
Vespi rolled her eyes. “We are on a mission, you know.”
“Yes, but that was before my life was on the line. I’d like to not get ground into dust, thank you very much.”
“Immortals!” Vespi pounded her hand son her chest. “We shouldn’t have to worry about these things!”
Bill cleared his throat. “Actually, we should be concerned. Death-Mammoths aren’t a joke. Even we Immortals presumably have one.”
“I don’t know what that means! We literally just got here. I was in stasis for like a thousand years or something. Speaking slowly.”
“Everyone in existence has a Death Mammoth,” he explained. “Presumably. They only seem to manifest here in Northyros. So, it stands to reason that even we Immortals have one. Death Mammoths appear when they’ve decided to end their charge’s life. Usually by grinding them into the ground.”
Vespi snorted. “Which goes back to my original statement of throw Gallen to the Manmoth and be done with it.”
Gallen scoffed, but Bill continued. “Yes, but as you can see, that is clearly not a Mammoth. It has somehow ascended to a humanoid form, a Manmoth if you will.”
“Don’t act like you just invented that phrase! It’s been used in the last handful of posts or something.”
“Manmoth…of Science?” The faint sound of a soldier’s head asploading elicited curious looks from Vepsi and Gallen, but a gleeful chuckled from Bill. “Ah, I had forgotten about that.”
Gale shouted again, “I SAID, MY FRIENDS WILL ARRIVE JUST IN TIME TO ASSIST ME IN MY BATTLE!”
Vepsi peeked over the porno crate. “We should probably do something before he gets himself horribly maimed.”
“Probably,” Bill agreed. Gallen nodded sagely as well, but neither moved.
“Useless,” she muttered. “Hey Felix, you still alive somewhere? If so, get over here. I want to do something to you!”
-
Jeff took his motorbike thing (which, incidentally, wound up looking like a regular motorcycle but with a pompadour) and signaled for the others to follow before turning to Vi’ir. “You sure Samantha will be able to catch up?”
“My master is quite resourceful.”
“Right. Alright!” With the others presumably in tow, Jeff sped off to the north, having a vague direction of where they should be headed. No one asked, but he felt like he should explain. “We’re heading to the last known location of Khilbron,” he shouted over the roar of the wind and engines. “He was somewhere in the tundra to the north.”
The ride north was actually really easy. Once in a while he could hear the macabre trumpeting of a Death-Mammoth claiming a new victim, but other than that, it was nothing but the cool wind rushing past his ears.
Finally, he pulled up outside a small one-street town. It looked a lot like a Hollywood western town from a cowboy film, but, you know, in the fizzing tundra. “Everyone spread out. There’s something here.” He almost followed that up with ‘I can feel it’ but decided it wasn’t quite time to start talking crazy. Yey.
He dismounted from his bike – which then collapsed into a portable crystal form that he pocketed – and cautiously set out to explore the seeming ghost town.
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Post by Calefrun on Jun 8, 2015 21:57:12 GMT -5
Dorrei approached one of the crystals and stood with her arms crossed, watching as it transformed. The resulting vehicle was a motorcycle like the others, but was painted bright orange and had several decorations that resembled tentacles. She couldn't help but notice that the machine's aesthetic theme closely resembled that of a video game designed for squid kids.
With a sigh, the former Illusive Squid commented, "Yeah, that figures." She climbed aboard the ridiculous-looking vehicle and started the engine, then followed after Jeff.
Zento grunted his acceptance of Samantha's request, still somewhat peeved by he previous comment. Not any help, huh? he mentally protested, I could have just left you tied up by those tendrils back there. After reaching into his pocket, he retrieved a small communication device, pressed a few buttons, and examined the device's display for a few seconds.
Raising an eyebrow, he muttered, "Looks like they're heading north... quickly, too. Sorry about this." With no further warning, he hoisted her up onto his back in a fireman's carry. "Not sure where they're going, but catching up will be easy enough."
Following Jeff's lead, Dorrei dismounted her bike and placed the crystal in her pocket.
"'Spread out,' huh? That could be trouble if we do run into something..." Despite her concerns, she started walking towards the town, choosing a direction that separated her from the rest of the group. Almost immediately after she took the first step towards the town, Zento and Samantha arrived right behind her. Without looking at them, she commanded, "Calfrun, you're with me. Put her down and let's get going."
Zento's first instinct was to immediately drop his passenger, but he thought better of it and instead gently set her down onto the snow-covered ground. He started after Dorrei, then turned to address Samantha. "Are you able to walk?"
Jack nodded after Twisted Gambit finished speaking, then added, "And I stole these cards fair and square- along with the secrets regarding their use- from some idiot scavengers trying to get out of Wessos a while back. Which makes them mine, according to the Laws of Thievery that I made up."
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Post by Mizagium on Jun 9, 2015 18:55:11 GMT -5
Sam clutched at her head and carefully sank to the ground. She scooted back so she was propped up against a frozen tree and smiled at Zento. “I’ll just rest a bit here. Though I might need you to carry me around again soon.” She winked at him and closed her eyes, shutting out the offending light.
Jeff stuck his head in several buildings, finding a town that had apparently been abandoned overnight. Fires crackled in hearths. Food sat half-eaten. Death-Mammoth shelters were open, but stocked with emergency supplies (like a family seppuku set). None of the homes were damaged, none of the shops looted. It was a town that looked as if a Mammoth horde had swept through, but…there were no signs of Mammoths.
“Ya-har! I see ya there, laddie!”
Jeff had been investigating a wardrobe in a single-story home when a small, stocky man with an impressive beard leapt from between the moth-eaten wools and fell upon Jeff snarling savagely. They tussled, rolled out into the street, and then Jeff found his wits and conjured several layers of barriers between them, pushing the crazy man away.
“The hell, man?” Jeff wheezed, scrambling to his feet. “We’re just trying to – “
“I know why ye be here: yer with them Mage folk, aren’t ya?”
“What, no! We’re – “
“Don’t be lying to me, laddie, I see that one there!” He jabbed a thick, calloused finger at Magnus. “He and we be mortal enemies, ya see.”
Jeff frowned. “Who are you anyway?”
The man thumped his chest. “Native Vikings, the true inheritors of Norythros. We were here before the spell-slingers came, before the in-between lands went off to the sky, and before the Mammoths fell upon the land like a blight.”
Jeff sighed. “I don’t have time for this. We’re looking for a man named Khilbron, have you seen him?”
“I no be talking to likes of you!”
“…Why are you talking like a pirate?”
“Let’s get ‘em lads!” The cray went up across the small town and a few dozen or so Vikings appeared from the various nooks and crannies in the town, and set upon the intrepid team, armed with axes and maces and beards. “For the icy north!”
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Post by Myrdraxxis on Jun 19, 2015 16:30:18 GMT -5
"Oh right, these guys." Magnus sighed in annoyance, dodging an ax thrown at his head at the same time.
"You know them, boss?" Leske asked, taking the initiative to lay down some suppressing fire with an impressive array of guns that probably didn't know anything about besides 'bullets come out of the shooty end'. Magnus would have to correct him on this later.
"Well, the Vikings used to control Northyros until folks who could form complex sentences," Magnus paused to fire off a flashy fire attack, "AKA the Magisters, took over."
"So they're trying to take back their homeland?"
"Well...'trying' would imply they've made any headway. Mostly they just walk up to our cities, can't figure out how the electronic locks on our doors work, and then leave."
"Huh." that was all Leske could say to that.
"That said, I don't think these guys will have any idea where Khilbron is." He raised his voice over the din of fighting. "Hey Jeff! Can I just like, kell em all now or do you want to talk to one first?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Felix was indeed alive. He was also very much conscious, and doing his best to appear otherwise.
'Maybe if they think I'm dead I can just sneak away later.' he reasoned. Seriously, fuck these guys. In the course twenty minutes (maybe) they had come in and pretty much ruined whatever semblance of normality that Felix had in his life. 'I should have listened to my dad and joined the family business. Sure, being a back-alley ramen chef wasn't very lucrative...but at least you usually lived through it.
No, Felix was content to just sit here and wait out the-
"Achoo!"
Then he sneezed. Loudly.
Gods dammit!'
With a sigh, Felix sat up and glared sullenly at Vespi. "What?"
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Post by Monika on Jun 20, 2015 19:33:34 GMT -5
We'll never find who we're looking for at this rate...
Sarina had barely dismounted her motorcycle when their team was assaulted by a band of Vikings, of all things. She was quite confident that they would be able to take they Vikings with considerable ease; Magnus alone was more than enough to vaporize the group (and he was all too willing to do so). But she couldn't help but feel that there was a better way to go about resolving this situation.
"Jeff wasn't able to reason with them," she muttered to herself, "but maybe that's because his approach was wrong. They do seem a lot like pirates..." She thought back to her childhood in Awesome Land. On the weekends, Leon would occasionally take her and Aurora out on his rowboat so they could pretend to be pirates. Sarina's pirate alias back then was 'Lieutenant S' and, alongside Captain L and First Mate Aurora, she got into many a wacky adventure. Perhaps if she adopted that persona again, she would be able to speak to the Vikings on equal footing.
"First thing's first, though," she said. "I have to look the part. Leon wouldn't forgive me if I did anything out of costume." While the rest of her team and the Vikings tried to kill each other, Sarina quietly slipped into one of the abandoned houses and searched for the proper attire. After wading through a sea of half-used emergency supplies, suicide notes, and wills, she eventually stumbled across a closet stocked with a variety of Viking costumes that looked as if they had all been imported from Sexy Land. Grabbing one at random (along with a horned helmet and discarded axe), she quickly changed outfits and ran back out into the street.
"Yaarrr!" she shouted, staring at all the Vikings with a disappointed Nordic mother look. "What do ye lads think yer doing? How d'ye expect to hold on to a town if yer pickin' battles with every group that walks through here? Ye've got a funny way of tryin' ta get back yer homeland!" A couple of the Vikings hung their heads in shame as they were scolded. "Honestly!" she said, pointing out the mage in their group. "That one's called Magnus, fer Freya's sake! Bout as Viking as they come! Ye've got nerve, attackin' him!" After shaking her head to convey maximum disappointment, she pointed her axe at each of them individually. "Now, one of ya's seen the one called Khilbron. Ye'll tell us where he be off to at once!" she demanded.
With a sigh, Community offered them each a (non-magical) business card which listed the location of an ancient Northyrosian courthouse. "It's obvious that neither fighting nor discussion are getting us anywhere. Why don't we just settle this with the legal system? And agree to be bound by real laws?" She emphasized the last part, glancing at Jack. "A neutral third party will decide this more quickly than any of us will."
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Post by Mizagium on Jun 21, 2015 16:38:35 GMT -5
Vespi snorted in his direction. No respect. Then, because she was made of living fire, she snaked across the ground, burning a winding path, and reformed beside the unlucky soldier. “I’m going to give you some power because I’d rather send you off to your maybe-death than anyone else, here ok?”
She didn’t wait for him to respond and seized his head in her hands. “Ok, this’ll burn.” And she pumped fire energy into the poor lad. “Ok, Felix, if I do this right, and don’t melt your brains, you’ll attain the power to create and command fire. Natural fire, magical fire, hellfire, dragonfire, holy fire, blackfire, cosmic fire, and spirit fyre. You should be able to manipulate all forms of fire. Not as much as I can, of course, but enough that you should stand a chance against the Manmoth and entertain at parties.”
After a moment, she pulled away, and admired her handiwork. “Well? Did I melt you?”
-
Jeff felt his face turn red when Sarina reappeared in her *ahem* Viking outfit. Vi’ir sighed and muttered something about his master having similar ideas.
“What in the twenty-eight-point-three hells is this?” A Viking, much taller and more well-spoken (and more gloriously bearded) stomped out of pile of rocks where he’d been laying some frozen bricks. An oversized axe was slung over his shoulder. All the Viking pirates ceased their pillaging and pointless fighting.
Olaf Olafson LXXXIII surveyed the assembled and snorted. “What did I tell you, lads? We ain’t here to pillage today! There’s something wrong with the world and we aim to fix it!”
All the Vikings scuffed their feet, ashamed. Olaf shot a venomous glance at Magnus, but spoke to Sarina. “You seem like a reasonable lass, and well versed in Viking culture I see!” He indicated her attire in a non-ironic way. “You say yer looking for a man called Khilbron? Well, so are we. Something’s gone wrong with Northyros and us TRUE Northyric folk are gonna set it right.”
Jeff sighed in relief. “Oh, good, I was worried we would have to – “
“I ain’t talking to you, lad,” Olaf snapped. “I’m conversing with the only one of you who has any sense.” He tapped his horned helmet, a virtual twin to Sarina’s own. “Now then, Miss…? Why are you this far into the frozen north?”
-
Twisted Gambit snapped the card up and frowned. “Laws,” he muttered. “Never had much use for laws.” He pulled his hand back and snapped it forward. The business card sliced through the air and buried itself in a nearby boulder. “I ain’t got the time no the inclination to carry on with this anymore.”
He straightened his coat, tipped his hat, and turned away from Community. “Be seein’ ya, little lady.”
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Post by Myrdraxxis on Jun 26, 2015 22:15:15 GMT -5
"I hate you with every fiber of my being." Was Felix's quick response. Mostly to disguise the insurmountable pain he was in at the moment. Still, he gritted his teeth and tried on to cry out. Showing signs of pain would get you devoured by feral vagabonds back home.
After a moment he exhaled loudly as the pain dissipated. "What did you even do...?"
He sort of trailed off, glancing down at his hands.
Which were on fire.
Felix didn't yell, mostly due to the fact that he clearly wasn't burning up. He stared at his hands for a moment. Yeah, Vespi had done something alright. He could feel it. Felix clenched his fists and the red flames disappeared...and then blue magical flames appeared in their place.
"So...all fire, huh?"
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Post by Monika on Jun 27, 2015 11:00:10 GMT -5
"My 'proper' name's Sarina Storms," Sarina introduced herself, making air quotes with her fingers, "but yer free to call me Sassa." Waving her axe airily at Jeff, she said, "That one told us that this was Khilbron's last known location. Yer guess is as good as mine as ta how he came up with that info, but we all decided ta listen to him anyway." She shrugged in an 'I regret that decision but there's nothing we can do about it now' sort of way and continued. "Course, if you've a better idea of where the man went off to, I'm all ears. Proper direction is the one thing this adventure of ours has been missing."
Yeah. Turn your back on me after I try my hand at peaceful conflict resolution. Whatever.
Being the emotionless heiress she is, Community couldn't bring herself to feel any type of way after her offer was so rudely rebuffed by Twisted Gambit. So she simply did what she had originally set out to do: eliminate anyone who threatened her family's property. Without a word, she slipped both hands inside her trenchcoat, withdrawing a gun with one hand and a silencer with the other. Putting them together, she pointed the weapon at Twisted Gambit, aimed at the back of his head, and pulled the trigger.
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Post by Mizagium on Jun 28, 2015 17:28:29 GMT -5
Olaf considered Jeff a moment before saying, “Aye, that one does look a bit airy in the rafters, if you catch my meaning.”
“Hey!”
“But in this case, the vacant-looking boy is correct, after a fashion.”
“I’m right here, you know!”
“Aye, and I ain’t talkin’ to ya! I met a man by that name not a few days ago. Can’t quite remember exactly what he looked like, but he was going on about something called a keystone. Not long after he came through here – and we were far off thataway, plotting our next move against the land-stealing mages of Blackspire” he shot a cold look at Magnus “when we heard…well…it’s hard to think about. It was the largest stampede of Death-Mammoths, I have ever seen. A great horde of them descended upon the town and there was much stomping and trumpeting and the like. And then it moved on, like a strong breeze over the tundra. And the town was left as you see it. Not one building was damaged. There’s not even a footprint to say that they were even here.”
Olaf stamped his axe, super-charged with kill-anything runes, on the permafrost and twisted it. “Now, I don’t know about you, but when an outlander comes through here, and then a horde of Mammoths follows him…that seems suspicious. I’ve been hunting the man ever since, but I can’t seem to pick up the trail. It’s hard to hunt up here, you know? Too cold and the ground doesn’t leave tracks.”
Olaf glanced around at his Vikings. “If you’re looking for the man who brought this disaster upon my homeland, then consider the Olafson Vikings your allies.” He extended a hand to Sarina.
-
Vespi snorted and rolled her eyes. “That’s what I said. Any kind of fire you can dream of. Now, go get ‘em, sport!” She gave the newly-empowered Felix a shove and ushered him out from behind cover to where Gale and Grimmtusk could see him.
“Aha!” Gale raised his greatsword in a cheer. “You see, monster? My allies have not abandoned me after all! Come, Flaming Felix, and join this epic quest to defeat a great beast!”
Meanwhile, Bill Nye and Gallen Kah just gave Vespi concerned looks. “Was that really smart?” the Immortal of Order asked.
Vespi shrugged. “Eh, maybe. Do you want to go out there instead? Besides, it’ll wear off in a few days or weeks or months or whatever.”
Bill Nye considered this. “We probably should help them, you know.”
“Probably,” Vespi agreed. But the three of them made no move from their protected position.
Gale deflected a strike from Grimmtusk, let the momentum carry him around and, “Righteous Hurricane!” On the backswing, he conjured a fierce wind in his hand that lifted the Manmoth off his feet and flung him onto some of the structures set up by the Northyric invaders. Heroes’ Refuge was getting destroyed. Again.
With a heroic backflip, Gale landed beside Felix and looked him up and down. “Have you any experience in monster hunting?”
-
Community might have fired with a silencer, but Twisted Gambit’s senses are TOO GOOD. He whirled, drew a card and - Power Source – the bullet curved around him, sailing off into the distance. He drew on his family’s inherent luck and manipulated that into controlling hostile forces around him.
“Little lady,” he said cooly, “are we really about to go at this again?”
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Post by Sariel of Tevet on Jun 28, 2015 18:26:25 GMT -5
The Dayman and Prince Elton appeared at the viking shenanigans. And when I say appeared, I mean made his typical grand entrance. The Dayman was shirtless and now wearing a fur covered codpiece with two horns jutting out from either side.
"So where do we start?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Uno Momento laughed a bit.
"Well about the only honest thing I ever did in my life was to win my deck in a card game. But...if you all still want to fight..."
Momento began to pull a card from his bandolier...when a card fell from the sky and implanted itself into the group in the middle of the four of them. He walked over, stooped down, and picked up the card which had a large spider on the back and a generic number and suit on the opposite side.
"A spider solitaire card...I haven't seen one of these since-"
The card exploded into a cloud of plot driven neuro-toxins that knocked out Uno Momento, Twisted Gambit, Community, and Jack.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Anywhere from minutes to days later, Uno Momento awoke in a dingy room with his hands tied around a load bearing pole. He was seated on the ground next to the other three, who were there captured as well.
"This sure brings back memories..."
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Post by Calefrun on Jul 3, 2015 20:06:24 GMT -5
“I’ll just rest a bit here. Though I might need you to carry me around again soon.”
Dorrei raised an eyebrow at her subordinate. "Guess the fight with the Archmage went well, huh?"
After some incomprehensible grumbling, Zento suddenly pointed behind her and muttered, "Hey, vikings are attacking or something."
The former Illusive Squid quickly drew her crossbow and turned around expecting to see battle, but instead found that everyone was just standing around and talking. "Yeah, 'or something' is right."
"I swear, they were all fighting like two seconds ago-"
"Yeah, yeah. Guess we should go see what's going on. Stay on your guard though; never know when one of them might try to start swinging their axe around or something."
“Never had much use for laws.”
"Riiiiight?" Jack watched as Community took aim at Twisted Gambit, slowly pulling another card form his deck.
"Well about the only honest thing I ever did in my life was to win my deck in a card game. But...if you all still want to fight..."
"Honestly, I'm starting to get kinda bored. I think I'll just take all of your cards, then we can all be on our merry way. Sound good?" He started casting a spell, but was interrupted by the plot.
He woke up some time later and looked around the room, spotting the others. "Huh. Awkward."
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Post by Monika on Jul 4, 2015 16:54:31 GMT -5
Sarina grabbed Olaf's hand and shook it with all the strength of a Viking woman. "Looks like we've got ourselves a team!" she proudly declared. "We'll find the man who did this and bring him to justice. Now it's just a matter of figuring out where to start..." She glanced over at Jeff, only half-expecting him to give the crew any more direction than he already had.
Unfortunately for the mysterious Spider Solitaire gang, Community's immunity to toxins was TOO GOOD, and she only pretended to be knocked out and captured so she could keep Twisted Gambit, Jack O. Spades, and Uno Momento in her sight. She might've done well as an actress if her heritage didn't lead her to career of espionage and assassination.
The people who captured us sure did some sloppy work, she thought. If they were going to go through the trouble of trying to poison us, they could have at least taken away my arm bracer... She looked behind her to the pole her "captors" had "tied" her to and shook her head with as much disappointment as her emotionlessness would allow. By clenching her right arm, she forced her bracer to eject its hidden blade, and within a few seconds she had cut herself free from the binds around her wrist.
"Temporary truce, alright?" she said to the captees. "You guys have been shifted to number two on my priority list."
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Post by Myrdraxxis on Jul 9, 2015 21:21:07 GMT -5
“Have you any experience in monster hunting?”
Felix opened his mouth to respond, then hesitated. Memroies came rushing back to him in a flash: the reason he had left behind his family business as a back-alley ramen chef. Most people didn't know it, but being in that line of work was a messy, violent affair. The streets of Blackspire crawled with all manner of beasts and creatures that the common folk chose to ignore in favor of the ever-present terror of death-mammoths. But Felix knew. All those in his former line of work knew. Within the back alleys of Blackspire crawled many species of vagrant, who twisted minds to madness with their hateful drunken gibberish and requests for spare cash. The giant rats, the many variations of wererodents and far worse.
Felix could still remember his battle against the many-faced rat king, Mhedigaur, Lord of Shadows.
And even then, far worse things lurked in the dark places where most white respectable citizens didn't even know to tread. Felix had finally had enough of killing creatures with too many noodles for arms and meatball abominations and chose a more reasonably safe career as an army grunt. Generations of magical use seeping into the earth, into places long forgotten clashed with the culinary arts of the ramen chef, and brought forth eldritch monstrosities that drove one to madness simply by looking at them. It was the duty of all back-alley ramen chefs to slay these creatures from the Outer Food Court. Few even know of how Strom'bolii The Ascended nearly plunged the nation into an age of darkness and pasta sauce, his many noodly appendages stretching out over the night sky bathed in the haunting moonlight.
"....Somewhat." Felix answered finally. He eyed Grimmtusk warily. "But I don't think it would do much good without my er, tools-"
"Hey Felix!" One of the (somehow) remaining Northyros soldiers, most of which were content to just kinda watch this bizarr turn of events from the sidelines, spoke up. "Your tent got destroyed by that Death-Manmoth. But I saved your stuff!" The soldier held up a large, polished wooden box. Felix sighed.
"Thanks Gary. Give it here." He caught it, sending a glare at Gary the Soldier, and popping the box open. "Yep, still here."
Felix withdrew a kitchen knife. Or at least, it would have been a kitchen knife if it wasn't ten times too large to be of any use as one. It looked more like a large sword. Felix set it aside and withdrew a long pole from the box as well, the second part of his culinary weaponry. He strapped the pole to his back and slung the over-sized kitchen knife onto one shoulder.
"Okay. Now I can do this."
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Post by Mizagium on Jul 10, 2015 11:13:58 GMT -5
Jeff frowned at Sarina and Olaf, but he couldn’t argue with their results. She had brokered peace with a violent people and…didn’t look half-bad in that outfit. He felt color bloom in his cheeks and coughed.
“Ah, right. We gotta…find Khilbron, so we should go…”
“You should go nowhere,” came a flat, echoing voice. “You will go no farther.”
“Who said that?” Jeff swung his head from side to side searching for the voice, while the Vikings adopted battle-ready stances.
“I cannot allow you to advance any further, let you complicate thing anymore than they need to be.”
“Look, we’re just after the – “
“I know what you’re after. The Keystone. You will not have it. The Mechanist King ordered me to seek it out, and now I have it.”
“…Khilbron?”
“And with it, I have become the master of the Death-Mammoths. I have…perfected the Death-Mammoths.”
The world seemed to shift for a moment, and another Death Manmoth appeared before them. Or should I say, Death Womanmoth (wuh hah wuh ha wuh ha) because it was a woman. She looked more human than mammoth, with the only remnants of her previous form being the coarse hair on her arms. Otherwise, she wore what looked like biker clothes: leather pants, and a sleeveless leather jacket zipped up to her neck. On second glance, her long brown hair was also probably mammoth hair. She didn’t have any visible weapon, oversized or otherwise.
“Take them down, Tusk Horrorbell.”
“Of course.” Her voice was hard. No one moved for a long moment while she surveyed those assembled. She identified Magnus as the strongest and then began ranking everyone else in descending order. The Viking leader was objectively the least powerful, but she recognized the kill-anything runes on his axe and decided he might be trouble. Which left…the fake Viking girl, Sarina.
“Wither,” she commanded, and her eyes turned black. The air around Sarina suddenly felt cold and empty, as if her very lifeforce was being drained away.
-
“Excellent!” Gale flourished his own wind-spun claymore and adopted and equally awesome sword-over-shoulder stance to mirror Felix’s. “Come at us, foul beast!”
“This is getting stupid!” Grimmtusk Jeagerhorns charged in from over the horizon, where Gale’s Righteous Hurricane had apparently sent him. The ground shook with every angry footfall, leaving small craters behind him. “Why do you protect the old man? I do not desire a quarrel with you. Give him to me and I will leave!” When neither Felix nor Gale showed any signs of moving, Grimmtusk snarled and ground to a halt, tearing up the ground as he did.
“I didn’t want to have to work too hard at this, you know? It was a lot simpler as a Mammoth…ah well. I suppose I’ll be forgiven for using these powers so soon.” He planted his sword in the ground and made a fist with his other hand. It started to glow…black?
“I’m taking the old man! Grasping Hand of Death!” He thrust his glowing fist forward and opened it; a large hand of black energy materialized from it and raced forward.
“Cyclone Fist!” Gale materialized his own giant hand – this one of swirling winds. The two giant hands met each other and grasped at each other… and started arm-wrestling. “Let us see who is the mightier man here today!”
Grimmtusk snorted. “I can tell that’s about all you’ll manage, you know. Luckily, I’m not even close to my limit! Grasping Hand of Death!” He repeated the technique, sending another Death Hand out towards Gale and Felix, while maintaining the arm-wrestling with the Cyclone Fist. “Death’s hand is unstoppable!”
-
Twisted Gambit sniffed derisively. “Temporary. Sure. Whatever you say.” He twisted out of the ropes by dislocating his wrists. Jack drew a card Dyson Sphere Construction and rolled his eyes. “Why do I even have that card?” He stuffed it back and looked around.
“They aren’t very good kidnappers,” he observed. “They didn’t know about your immunity and they didn’t even take our cards – Mine, at least. What the hell is going on, anyway?” He thought about drawing another card. Loading up two powers wasn’t beyond his abilities and his current one was next-to-useless. Sure, constructing a Dyson sphere might have its applications, but the cards were very specific. He wasn’t able to harness that solar energy, just…build a Dyson sphere.
He moved around and undid the ropes for Jack and Uno. “I guess we’re busting out of here.”
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Post by Calefrun on Jul 12, 2015 16:10:46 GMT -5
"Heh, I knew following you was a good idea!" The mound of snow next to Tusk Horrorbell spoke up with a gruff voice. It began to rise, slowly revealing itself to not really be a pile of snow, but actually a young viking man wearing camoflagued armor. In one hand he held a silenced pistol, which he had pointed at the back of the womanmoth's head. In the other was a hand axe, held upside down next to the gun as part of a stance developed for close-quarters-combat.
"I noticed that some of the Death Mammoths were beginning to act strangely," he contined, "so I decided to track one of them. You're Khilbron, eh? And it's because of you that this mammoth looks like a human? Once she's been dealt with, I think you and I are going to need to have a talk." Grinning, he pulled the trigger.
Within the same instant that the newcomer attacked Horrorbell, Zento appeared in front of her and thrust his blade towards her torso. In the meantime, Dorrei had started charging towards the womanmoth, trident poised to strike.
"Pff, like I needed your help with those," Jack scoffed. "Anyway, if you guys want to accompany me as I make my daring escape, I guess that's fine." With an overdramatic flourish, he drew the next card from his deck and looked at it, after which his expression turned sour. "Environmental field projection. Well, I guess if there's a freakin' inhospitable wasteland outside, we're in luck. Oh whatever, I'll just do this the old-fashioned way."
He made his way over to the door and retrieved a lockpick from his pocket. After a few seconds a click resounded throughout the room, and the door swung open. "It's good to see I haven't gotten rusty since I started using these cards. Anyway, let's go, amigos!"
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Post by Sariel of Tevet on Aug 12, 2015 15:57:37 GMT -5
Uno Momento shook his head Jack and his lockpick.
"That is a lot fancier than what I was going to do. I just...thought we could uh...slide a card along the door frame and jiggle the handle a bit until it opened. Always works for me. Now."
He placed a hand on the nearest card in his bandolier.
"Getting out of here shouldn't be too troublesome. The Spiders are pretty low tier. The problem really is...what does the Bicycle Gang want with us? I mean..I understand why they would want me. I have been on the run for years but..why you all as well?"
Uno pulled the card that his hand was on and revealed a green +2 card. He quickly drew two more and found that he had a Destiny Manipulation Card and a Reverse. He tossed the Reverse aside because it seemed a bit silly and played his Destiny Manipulation Card. A large book appeared before the group which mapped out the entire compound, complete with moving dots that were enemies and guards. Uno laughed so himself and said, "Mischief Managed," half jokingly.
The book closed itself and disappeared, because apparently that phrase actually works. Uno frantically felt the floor for his Reverse card and played it, causing his previously used card to be reused and the book to reopen.
"Well that was a close one. So uh...this way I suppose," Uno said as he walked out of the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Dayman scoffed and groped his hairy mammoth codpiece with horns.
"I'm more of a mammoth than this girl is, she can't be too strong. But let's see...how to defeat a mammoth..."
The Dayman took off his infinity belt and pushed his head inside the interdimensional hole to look for a suitable weapon.
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Post by Monika on Sept 7, 2015 12:12:44 GMT -5
For a brief second, Sarina decided to let the effects of Tusk's magic overtake her. And then that brief second turned into what felt like days. Maybe even two months. But she didn't feel anything. After realizing that the Arrancar Death-Manmoth Death-Womanmoth sorcery wasn't going to do anything else no matter how long she waited, she finally spoke up. "I guess...someone didn't hear my hit song."
Cold air? Emptiness? Lifeforce being drained? Those were all the trademarks of the Null-Void, a dimension in which Sarina had spent quite some time during her stint in the Awesome Land Imperial Army - one she had even written a famous song about! Needless to say, she was quite used to the effects of Tusk's attack and was more than a little miffed that the Womanmoth hadn't listened to the only song Sarina and her former band were known for.
"Is that all? Looks like whoever created you didn't do his research," Sarina said, dispelling Tusk's wither-grip with a wave of green and black energy. "Lord Veralice always told me to size up my opponent before any conflict. In all honesty, I don't think I can defeat you - not as easily as the last Death Manmoth, at least - but I am definitely not about to lose to some two-bit shell of an attack. You're about six months, three days, and one war too late for that. I've seen far worse in Awesome Land."
And then she flash stepped (chaos style) behind Tusk, joining Zento, Dorrei, and the newcomer in their mutual assault.
"The Bicycle Gang," Community repeated, considering the name. She had briefly heard of them during her childhood training. She didn't recall too much of them, but they weren't even at the bottom of her objectives list, so they couldn't be too much of a threat.
"Ambitious, though," she thought aloud. "Recklessly so to attempt to kidnap the heiress to the Chest family and three random copyright-infringing card fighters." Fighters of considerable power...
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