Awesome Land VI: Dawn of a New Era

[Myrdraxxis]

Zais opened his mouth, an evil smirk forming on his lips as he went to say something, then closed his mouth again. He turned and gave Kayla and Heimrall a weird look, then turned back to the group and tried again.

"Honestly I'm surprised it took this long for it to come to this." He said lightly, standing up and cracking his neck a few times. "The only person who matters that tried to stop me was the Time Keeper and look what happened to him?"

Dace frowned. "I tried to stop you-"

"Only person who matters." Zais cut him off snidely.

"Are we seriously going to just let him monologue?" Xaadm leaned over and whispered to Myrxxan. Frankly, the young wizard had indeed been planning to let Zais talk. It was a matter of drama. But now that Xaadm mentioned it.

"Eh, I guess not."

"Cool." That said, the Nobody launched a flurry of conjured words at the Immortal of Darkness. Zais wasn't even looking at the on-coming attack, and right before it connected he suddenly wasn't there anymore.

"Interrupting people is rude." Xaadm stiffened in horror as Zais' voice came from over his shoulder. The Immortal Reared a hand back and punched Xaadm in the face. Which sent Xaadm flying into a wall of debris. Several hundred yards away.

"I sure hope you've got better than that." Zais raised an eyebrow. The area around him began to Darken. Power hummed through the air as Zais began gathering more and more Darkness to him. Zais raised an arm and conjured his old, well-used scythe into his hand. He gave it a few test swings and the ground began to vibrate as fissures formed, wisps of pure darkness rising up from the cracks. Zais had had a long time to spread his influence with little oversight, and now he was calling upon all of it. 

"This will be messy." Sindri muttered, already conjuring a spell to fire off. Dace simply nodded.

"Nothing for it, I guess. Attack!" Dace pointed his sword towards Zais and charged.

Zais grinned madly.

[Sariel of Tevet]

Zais had managed to survive non-canon, something most extended universes never do, so it was clear that this battle would be greater than anything Captain Albert Alexander had ever faced. He pulled a larged, sanded down walrus tusk that was fashioned into a shofar and began to call through it. A 100 story tall walrus with one tusk walrussed up towards the Ghost Sea Slater. It opened wide and everyone's favorite nautical navigator parked the ghoulish galleon into its mouth.

"Forward, old friend! We have work to do!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heimrall watched as as Zais began his assault, but became distracted by the giant fucking walrus that walrussed its way onto the battlefield.

"Dude, really? I've been an immortal for like...a day. I get brought all the way out here. Find out I'm not the only immortal. Get my phone broken. My face is cut and I won't even look good for.....oh God. PROM. PROM IS SOON. UGH. AM I IN OVER MY HEAD HERE? I MEAN LOOK AT ALL OF THIS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COMPETE WHEN ALL I CAN DO IS BUILD STUFF WITH DIRT?"

Wait...can I....no. No....it's gonna happen now.

Heimrall smiled and rose herself up a couple of hundred feet on her own little platform. She waved her hands around and guided a large dust swarm around herself and the cylinder she was standing on, and a large body began to form. A bulky, humanoid outline began to form in the midst of the dust and the platform dissipated to become part of it. It hardened into the toughest form of stone that Heimrall could manage, and was covered in layered plates entirely save for the head area in which she was standing and could see out of. She moved about in the open area of the golem and it mimicked her moves, which was awkward because Heimrall was quite excited about her plan working so it was now jumping up and down and making squeeing motions. I promise, this thing is pretty deadly.

"DON'T WORRY, MALCOLM, THIS BATTLE WILL BE OVER BEFORE PROM."

She raised her hands, the golem followed suit, and then she slammed them down above Zais.

[Mizagium]

Rick Thunder had a plan. And a man with a plan was a dangerous thing. Rick Thunder with a plan was a disaster waiting to happen. “Petra,” he declared, triumphantly standing atop his pterian friend, unless he was already standing atop her, in which case he double stood up. It’s like regular standing up, only about 4 times as cool. “I have a plan,” he announced, making the whole previous paragraph sort of a waste of everyone’s time. But hey, you’re here now, so you might as well enjoy the ride.

“Take this Pretzelteen fellow to where the..uh…You know, I was never totally clear on what exactly was going on, but go where the main bad guy is right how. Use him as a human shield if you have to.”

And with that, Rick Thunder did a triple axel jump off of Petra and spiraled down to the ground with the utmost coolness. He landed, his hair tastefully disheveled and his jacked askew in such a way that was unbearably cool. Too bad the city had been evacuated, so there were no ladies present to swoon. He made a note to induce double swooning when this was all over.

Well whatever. He left his person in its coolly undone state and tapped into whatever source his dinomancy sprung from. It certainly was a powerful power source, whatever it was, because it certainly filled up his body or mind or something. Anyway, he took that power and SHOVED IT deep down in the earth, down where the sun don’t shine ifyouknowwhatimean. After a minute of feeling his way around in the dirt, he found what he was looking for, which was pretty lucky, because he didn’t have a backup plan in case there wasn’t anything there. But there was, so it’s fine.

Fierce tremors rocked the whatever region of the city that he was in, which he didn’t know the name of. Buildings toppled, streets crumbled, and more than a few museums lost priceless ancient art – pieces that had been on display ever since the city was founded six months and three days and some time ago.

“Can’t make…a pancake…without…stomping a few…gerbils…” he muttered. Then the ground rent apart, and a massive and I MEAN MASSIVE dinosaur skeleton burst forth. A Greater Impossisaurus Rex. Taller than an unbelievabear and more massive than a lawlasaurus, the Greater Impossisaurus Rex (or G.I.R.) had been a titan of its time an indefinitely ridiculous number of years ago, and might have become the dominant species on the world except for the fact that it hadn’t.

It reared back and roared, something that ought to have been impossible, being a skeleton and all. Rick, still panting (in a cool way) from the exertion of it all, pointed at wherever Petra had flown and commanded, “Fetch.”

GIR charged, tearing up even more of the city with huge, clawed feet. AND THEN IT PICKED UP THE RELATIVELY INTACT REMAINS OF THE UNDERBOOB IN MASSIVE SKELETAL JAWS. AND SHOOK IT.

Hopefully no one else important besides Zais was still on board.

[Calefrun]

"Oh jeez, this is... oh jeez" Kayla muttered while tumbling around in the food court, which was currently being shaken by a giant skeletal dinosaur... or something. "Stop za warudo, I wanna get off..." She was suddenly flung out of one of the holes in the Underboob's wreckage, landing on top of G.I.R.'s head. "I don't... feel so good..."

An all-too-familiar laugh filled her ears, and Kayla rolled over to find another figure standing on top of the giant dino. He spoke in an amused tone, "Overdid it a little bit with the booze, don't you think?"

"S-Sark!" She gasped, jumping to her feet. Struggling to maintain her balance, she drew her scythe and readied herself to try and attack the Vampire Lord.

Her twin brother's mouth twisted into a cruel grin. "Do you really think that's wise? You would have little hope of defeating me normally, let alone in your current state. Besides..." he raised his hands, showing that he wasn't holding a weapon, "I'm not here to participate in this battle; I only wish to watch."

Kayla shot him a fierce look. "You're going to try to steal Zais' power, aren't you?"

Sark shrugged. "His or Knox's- whichever is easier. I could care less who wins this little scrap, so long as I manage to consume one of these so-called 'Immortals.' Though, there is one thing I should probably take care of first." He slowly approached Kayla, and as soon as he was within range she swung her scythe at him. The vampire conjured a sword in his right hand and easily deflected the attack, then with his left he delivered an open-palmed strike to the center of her chest, sending her flying off of G.I.R. She sailed horizontally for several meters, then started to plummet. Somehow, through the deafening wind rushing past her ears, Kayla could still hear Sark laughing atop the dinosaur's head.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

Meanwhile, Cozaltene was still asleep or something I guess.

[Myrdraxxis]

"bringing out the big guns already, are we?" Zais mused in, er, amusement. From the air. It hadn't looked like he had even moved. One moment he was standing there in the wreckage of the ship, the next he was floating above, watching as the giant dinosaur shook it. Distantly he could hear the sounds of terror from the few hookers who hadn't made it to the escape pods. Oh dear.

Nearby, one such escape pod was lodged into the side of a building. The door creaked open and Captain Neero stumbled out, angry, confused and still kind of drunk. Several of the bridge crew and Ydda followed him out.

"Well, I guess that's it." Neero sighed. "We had a good run guys, but..."

"It's alright, captain." One of the crew grinned weakly. "We may be out, but we did a hell of a job."

"Yeah, we actually got to fight in a real battle for once!" Another added.

"And at the very least, we went out fighting." Ydda agreed.

"Yeah, you're right. I may not be much of a good military officer, but at the very least, we gave a hell of a fight. THe ol' SS Underboob went down fighting, and we can always remember that ship with dignity and pride."

Neero grinned, turned around, and took in the sight of the Greater Impossisaurus Rex shaking the broken remains of the Underboob like a giant chewtoy.

There were no words.

Only sobs.

...

...

Well anyway...

Zais sighed and snapped his fingers. Orbs of Darkness hovered around him. "Guess I can try to enjoy myself a little bit." He said and the Orbs became lances of dark energy that speared down out of the sky towards the three creatures that had been conjured to fight him, attempting to skewer them

Then he disappeared into a portal of Darkness, re-appearing behind Heimrall.

"Don't really know who you are, but as a fellow Immortal I suppose I can afford you the respect of killing you first." Zais shrugged and casually swiped his scythe towards her neck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By this point Ouran had thrown caution to the wind and, if he was honest, really had no idea what he was doing anymore. He just kinda rolled with things and it seemed to be working. One might say that he was following instincts, a destiny deep within himself only just now being realized. A destiny greater than that of just a one-off mook in a story no one really remembers anymore.For we are all the main characters of our own story, and in this place and time Ouran was realizing his own greatness. One might also argue that that's lame and shut up nerd.


"There's no need for any more words, GOLDBEZ." Ouran grinned a wild, crazy grin. "Only GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTS!"

He shouted the last word, a shout that shook his very soul, and indeed the soul of the entire world.

He could feel power building deep within him. Not in his heart. Lower. Much lower.

"I don't need a final form to beat you!" He challenged and with a mighty cry he PELVIC THRUSTED upwards. A great beam of energy shot forth, destroying the Giant GOLDBEZ overhead, and continuing onward. Growing. Hardening. Wiping away the cosmic infinity of GOLDBEZ'S that loomed throughout the galaxy.

Then He punched normal GOLDBEZ in the face.

[Mizagium]

One of the benefits of being the Immortal of Time was near perfect memory recall. It wasn’t a trait he had developed through training or been born with, like Artemis, but one that had been thrust upon him once he took on the mantle. Well, that wasn’t true, exactly. His early memories had been buried deep via a team effort of the old Time Keeper, Ara, and himself most recently. But now that he’d traveled back in time and met his kid self (and parents) all those blocks had come away, through some effort. His personal experiences from birth to the present time (relatively) were all available for instant recall.

He supposed it wasn’t true eidetic memory, as the trick involved micro time travel in his mind, but the result was the same. In any case, he recalled early days of being with Organization XXI, when they had come into conflict with local gang lords in Fun Land. Not that it mattered nowadays, but the Organization had been pretty instrumental in wiping out organized crime – by assimilating it all into itself, but hey, no one’s perfect.

Jace had been one of the many kids taken in off the streets, having been a part of one of those smaller, more violent gangs. The gang leader hadn’t been too happy about losing Jace to the Organization and brought his forces to square off against Ara’s…well, Knox supposed now the proper term was child soldiers. Point was, that guy had been a lot like Zais: insane, powerful, out to conquer or ruin everything in sight, a penchant for the color black. They had taken him down; he was too dangerous to be left alone.

That was how Knox felt about Zais now. He was more than willing to acknowledge that maybe the situation hadn’t been handled the best that it could have – he would discuss it with Artemis later – but Zais had to be stopped. For good.

At least he wasn’t alone, right? Someone had conjured that dinosaur skeleton, and he thought he sensed Heimrall. Also some more Darkness-affiliated folks…was that Dace? And the general lady from before, whom he spied off to the side of where he walked.

“You, uh, going after Zais, too?” he asked.

“The Goddess has spoken to me,” she said without looking at him. “She has said, Clara, take up your spear and defend the light from the consuming darkness. Go in my name and you shall prevail.” She raised her spear to emphasize.

“Ah.” Knox turned and looked straight ahead, which was just as well, since the spear-wielding general sprouted wings of light and flew ahead. He supposed he better keep up. Time was much easier to manipulate in the sealed space. Normally, it required effort to localize the effect, but in this bubble, his powers wouldn’t extend past the boundary, so slowing time to a crawl was less than effortless. He casually strolled along, passing the general.

The fight scene was a mess. Parts of the Underboob lay scattered about. A huge dinosaur skeleton had one large piece like a dog’s chew toy. Some of the crew looked on in despair. Some vampire guy stood atop the dinosaur and some other lady he hadn’t met was there, focusing more on the vampire than Zais. Zais, of course, was the, attacking Heimrall with his scythe. So, Knox considered, having basically all the time to do so.

With a shrug, he shoved Heimrall out of reach of Zais’s scythe (hehehe Zais’s scythe; that almost rhymes) and positioned himself off the side, but close enough so Zais would definitely notice him. Then he let time resume normally.

“Hey, buddy, how’s it going?” He quipped as Zais’s attack (presumably) missed.

-----

WHILE GOLDBEZ WAS STILL REELING FROM THE GUTSY MAN-PUNCH TO THE FACE, THE SEXY SPHINX…LAUGHED. AND OH WHAT A LAUGH IT WAS. BABIES THOUSANDS OF DIMENSIONS OVER STARTED GIGGLING IN RESPONSE, CREATING A WORLD-WIDE SHOCKWAVE THAT AWOKE THE GREAT ELDERLY ONES, SIGNALLING THE END OF DAYS.

“The Sphinx is amused,” the Comet declared. “As for me, I’m mildly entertained. The sexy angels are all spent and the normies are even more jealous than normal. All in all, I’d say you guys get a B.”

Faster than a one night stand, the positioned himself between Ouran and Goldbez, flexing his incredible Abs.

“Walk it off, son,” he said to Goldbez. “As for you,” he said to Ouran, “You have been deemed worthy of the Sexy Force of Guts!” He clapped him on the shoulder in a very manly manner, like two brothers who had just murdered the man who had killed their parents in front of them when they were children. And tossed the body into the sewer after removing all identifying features like fingerprints, teeth, and genetalia. Yeah, they’ll never link it to us, Ron, we finally did it, after twenty years. It’s over.

“Now, go! Spread the Sexy Force throughout the universe!” He raised his hands theatrically, then dropped them. “Or hang out here. Whatever, man, I’m not your boss.” After an awkward moment of kicking at the dirt he added, “So, you guys want to go throw stones at the normies?”

[Sariel of Tevet]

Heimrall brought the stone that formed the left arm of her golem and created a thick shield at her neck. The scythe caught the shield and Heimrall warped the stone around the weapon, as well as Zais. She let the golem slowly disappear around her as she descended to ground level. The stone kept gathering tighter and tighter around Zais in an attempt to crush him all at once.

[Razgat]

"Hey! Heeeeeeeey!" Cybele shouted from on top of the buffalo she was riding, who was still walking away. "Don't ignore me! Did I win, or did I win? And if I did win, which of course I did, who's up next for a good pounding?" She pounded her fist into her hand, ready to go another round.

[Myrdraxxis]

"Been better." Zais replied to Knox, glancing down at the earth prison currently trying to crush him to a pulp. "Sorta fun all things considered."

"It's about to get a lot worse." Zais glanced up and sighed as he spotted Dace ready to decapitate him with the Hero Sword. .

"Ugh, you again. Seriously guy, what's your....deal..." Zais trailed off, frowning at Dace. More specifically, at the sword in his hands. "Where did you get that? That's-you.." Zais squinted at Dace in confusion. He didn't even seem to be noticing Heimrall crushing him anymore.

"I'm afraid that this is the end of the line Lord Zais. Your mind is too far gone." Sindri appeared, magic charged and ready.

"That sword..." Zais ignored him.

"Last thing you'll ever see." Dace growled, and raised the blade high.

Zais blinked at him. "Darren?" He asked. "Is that you?"

The question made Dace stumble, and in that moment Zais exploded, Darkness blasting outward in every direction. When the attack subsided Zais was, unsurprisingly, free. He didn't attack though. He just stared at The group with an unfocused gaze for a moment.

Then he turned around and with a wave of his arm opened a portal. "That sword shouldnt be here." Dace heardhim mutter and then step through.

"Er, is he leaving thew fight?" Sindri asked. Dace scowled.

"Oh hell no."

The pair immediately followed after Zais.

When they exited the portal Sindri pulled up short, looking around. It was apparent that they weren't in Awesome Land anymore. The land around them was dead. Whatever vegetation once grew there had long since withered away leaving only cracked earth behind. The sky was a dull gray, and in the distance the ruined remains of civilization spread upwards like weeds.

"Sindri..." Dace said, looking around.

"This is Umbra Isla." Sindri replied softly.

[Mizagium]

Knox just sort of threw up his hands when first Zais, then Dace and Sindri disappeared into the portal. "What even," he voiced aloud. "After I went through the trouble of asking Artemis to seal this space off from the rest of the world. And he just OPENS A PORTAL to... where did he go?"

Muttering to himself, Knox ducked into the portal and emerged just behind Dace and Sindri ."On fizzing Dead Island of the Darkness." He shook his head. "Man, she's going to be pissed when I tell her about this. Or she telepaths it. Or whatever."

"Are you just going to stand there and complain?" Clara Lux emerged from the portal a few moments later, still looking angelic, wrapped in the warm but hard light of a seraph. "Or are we going...to.." She seemed to finally take notice of the land around her. The dead earth, the dark sky, the ominous ruins. "This is place is evil."

Knox snorted. "Yeah, right?"

"No, I mean, this place...is the source of evil. You there!" She stormed over towards Sindri and Dace. "I have tolerated the two of you for far too long. Explain this to me," she demanded, gesturing with Belaneir. "What is this palce? Why have we been brought to the root of the darkness?"

[Calefrun]

Coughing, Al climbed out of the escape pod behind Neero and the others. He joined the captain in surveying the situation outside, and whistled. "I'll be honest- this uh... this is not how I was expecting this day to go." He sat down and ran a hand through his hair, slowly shaking his head.

---

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHH.... Okay, seriously?" Kayla looked around as she continued to fall. "I know we're in the middle of a fight and all, but nobody could spare the three seconds to stop me from falling to my death?" She sighed. "Fiiiiine, I'll do it myself."

She swung her scythe, catching it on one of G.I.R.'s leg bones, then used it to swing around and launch herself into Zais' portal. On the other side, her momentum continued to carry her forward, until she somehow wound up in a seated position atop Knox's shoulders. From her heightened vantage point, she looked around and took in her surroundings. "Wow, this place looks... uh... where are we, exactly?"

[Bruce Leroy]

"Well, you are currently are on my island base. I'm not going to ask how you found this place. All I know is that know that you have seen it I simply cannot allow you to leave. This island is a sanctuary that I have built. This island is the foundation upon which a the new world will be made! For the greater good of all living beings, I Metal Gear Fish, will have to get rid of you people."

With a confident smile, Metal Gear Fish pressed a button on his wrist watch and an alarm sounded throughout the base. He then reaching into his coat pocket and pulled out a cigar. Placing it into him mouth he laughed as the sound of chainsaws began to draw closer.

[Sariel of Tevet]

Heimrall knelt down and picked up a fist full of dirt and watched as it sifted through her fingers and back to the ground.

"I don't like the way the earth feels here. It's wrong. What has Zais done now? But more importantly guys...where is he?"

Her eyes widened and she fell to the ground with a heart wrenching screech, beating her fists on the ground and creating little craters. She began to sniffle and held her phone up for the group to see.

"We don't get service here..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Captain Albert Alexander and his crew were hard at work fighting whatever battle they were still fighting when he suddenly ordered a halt. He looked around and noticed that there was no one left in the area and that a portal had just closed.

"They....they left without us. Now I'll never get to finish my theme song! Wait...."

Captain Albert Alexander began to stroke his long wispy mustache.

"Immortal of Darkness...portal...he must have...yes. That's it. That's where he is. And seeing as how I am now on a ghost ship, I'm sure we can get there quite easily!"

And they uh...did. The Ghost Seaslater just sort of phased into Umbra Isla right next to the main group.

"Well now, looks like you all have an immortal to find. Climb aboard! Ghost ship adventures for everyone!"

One of the crew members spied Metal Gear Fish and pulled out a fishing rod, casting a lure down at the ground right in front of him. The other members of the ghost crew just sort of shook their heads at him and went about preparing the ship to find Zais.

[Myrdraxxis]

Sindri and Dace looked at each other and Sindri sighed. "Umbra Isla," he began, speaking over the ever increasing sound of chainsaws. Dace was giving a confused look to Metal Gear Fish in the background. What the actual fuck? "Way back when, it was just a normal world like any other."

Sindri glanced around. "It was also the home world of Zais and many of those Shadow beings that follow him today."

"It was also a primary headquarters to Xavian the previous Immortal of Darkness." Dace added.

"Indeed." Sindri nodded. "It was here that Xavian was cast down, slain by a hero of the people who led us in rebellion against the Immortal."

[Bruce Leroy]

"Look you fools! My unit and I have been watching for far too long." Reaching into his coat pocket, Metal Gear Fish gave a menacing chuckle. "You no clue the number of bases and hideouts I have at my disposal. You cannot fathom the depths of my ambition. I have been here in the shadows the whole time, watching, waiting. Admittedly, I did not plan on you all finding me, but that is of no consequence." Pulling out his lighter and raising it to his cigar to light it. "From the darkness and the shadows, in the quite of the night, we shall be there to protect our interests we shall not fail." Lowering his hand from the front of the cigar to take a puff.

The sound of chainsaws echoed throughout the room. "So this is why you called us boss? This will be fun."

[Mizagium]

Far, far away or whatever - we really don't know how far away Umbra Isla is from Awesome Land, or if it's even in the same dimension - that persistent cloud of darkness that was Xavian rocketed across the sky and slammed in the space barrier that Artermis had constructed. YOU KNOW. THE ONE THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO KEEP ZAIS CONTAINED OR AT LEAST BE A CHALLENGE. Like a cockroach scurrying from the light, it shifted all around, trying to find a way in, snarling and gnashing in existential hunger.

"Zzz....zzzzZais....where are....don't you hide...from..."

After a moment, the black cloud skittered away as a humaniform being of light manifested nearby. The light-being communicated something in a series of pulses and patterns across its body, and the darkness snarled. As one, they lifted what amounted to their heads to the sky, simultaneously detecting...something.

"ZzzzzZais..." Xavian hurled himself away from the barrier and into the sky, tearing away at it until he had carved open a portal of darkness and slipped away, again. The humaniform light hesitated only an instant before blinking out, as well.

-

Knox didn't seem to mind Kayla perching atop his shoulders, although he did cast a wary glance at the...the Ghost Sea Slater. "Not every day you get to kill an Immortal," he quipped. Then he recalled Superion's slaying of the previous Time Keeper and frowned. "Well, anyway. I have a sneaking suspicion about the next part of the story, but I'm going to let you tell it."

Clara, on the other hand was much more concerned with Metal Gear Fish and his...chainsaws. "Suffer not the fish to live," she intoned and rushed MGF, brilliant spear Belaneir poised to skewer the strange life form.

[Bruce Leroy]

“How dare you attack our leader, the great and fearless MGF!” Baird yelled standing between MGF and Clara. “You don’t deserve to shine his boots, which I don’t understand why a fish needs boots anyway, let alone to be in his presence. Nothing will come in between us and our goal of Militaires Sans Poisson. Together under Big Fish we shall unite all the lands and end all of these pointless battles and unite under one giant fishy banner. Prepare meet my chainsaw gun and to meet you shift, gore-fill, homoerotic doom!”

MGF, Cole, and Dom all turn toward Baird dumbfounded and confused.

“Do you know how long we’ve… excuse me… I’ve been working on this plan!? And you just go blabbing it out the first time you get to speak!,” MGF barked at the solder. “ We just got put back into this story and you go and pull a stunt like that? Come on man! Marcus?!”

“Yessir!”

“Why did you let this poor excuse for a solder talk to the enemy?”

“Well you see, we had told him he wasn’t allowed to talk, but he swore this might be his only chance to talk for a while and we all kinda felt bad for him.”

MGF takes in a deep breath of regret and cigar smoke. “Just … take care of the intruders. What’s done is done. I’ll just have to alter my plans. MY PLANS THAT I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON FOR GOD KNOWS HOW LONG!!” With that MGF turns around and starts walking towards his platform and stands on it as it begins to lift him to his perch to watch. “And Baird… I’m happy you finally are admitting it.”

With that Delta Squad All rev up their Mark 3 Lancer assault rifles and Marcus charges towards Clara head first.

[Mizagium]

Clara's elite seraph powers allowed her a slowed perception of time. Or faster, whichever one serves my purpose here. With Delta Squad returning the charge, she wondered at their complete lack of regard for their own lives. Who charges headfirst at a magical glowing spear pointed at you? These losers, apparently. Not wanting to murder them (not at least until she had sufficient evidence of their heresy) she pivoted mid-stride, arcing Belaneir away, and bringing Falbrenth, her shield, forward instead.

"You are a fool to take up residence in this place" she declared, "and even more foolish to challenge me!" She slammed into Marcus, powered by holy light and the strength of Falbrenth, she carried the soldier back, away from his comrades. "I will purge you all from this world!"

[Bruce Leroy]

"Dammit! Why don't you understand we are trying to save all of the Lands. We only want to end this constant and senseless battling. Under MGF there will be no more fighting and there will finally be peace across the lands. If you wish to stand in the way of that peace, then I will have no choice but to destroy you."

Marcus braced himself and shoved Clara back causing her to lose her balance. At that moment Dom pointed his rifle at Clara ready to fire.

"Drop your weapon and surrender." Dom commanded as Marcus pointed his gun at Clara. Cole and Baird turned towards the crowd looking at the scuffle.

"I got a bad feeling about this Baird."

[Myrdraxxis]

"Unfortunately, in Xavian's defeat he struck one final blow, forcing our hero to take on Darkness for himself." Sindri continued, trying very hard to not be distracted by the sudden fight between paladin and fish going on in the background. Dace wasn't even bothering to do that much, and has started eating popcorn from the stash he kept in his coat pocket.

"I'm sure you have guessed by now." Sindri sighed. "Zais was the one who led us against Xavian and, in turn became the Immortal of Darkness." Sindri turned and gazed at the broken land around them. "He was a hero, once." Sindri's voice wa suddenly very tired. "But Darkness is, by its very nature, a consuming thing. It erases everything in the end. Including the mind of its holder."

"Zais has reached the breaking point." Dace shrugged. "The fact that he came back here is plenty proff of that. The very first world he consumed in Darkness. People included." Dace nodded to Sindri.