from /777/

[TEAM_DERRICK]

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426 New 40k Faction Heirononymous 09/05/10(Sun)01:05 No. 426

I have an idea for A 40k faction, one that I think is quite original and has much potential for equal parts awesome and humor.

A Space Marine retirement home.

It would consist of a bunch of dreadnoughts armed with power-walkers and -canes for close quarters weapons, and hellfires in giant grimdark wheelchairs for fire support. They would be attended by Mechanicus orderlies adorned with clean blue scrubs and Sisters of Battle nurses (hospitallers, no less) and it's formal name would be the Adeptus Astartes Retirement Platoon.

What does /777/ think of this?

>> Anonymous 09/05/10(Sun)03:23 No. 433

Epic.

I would play this faction if its battle cry was "Get of my lawn!"

>> Anonymous 09/05/10(Sun)13:58 No. 467

I personally want one of the legendary generals to be a space marine with a leg he lost in the great heresy and an eye he lost fighting off a tyranid swarm. Now in days he just sits around in his chair "inspiring" troops to battle reminding them that "I fought for this god damn galaxy!". He gets bonuses like "HATE" when fighting the Tau since "There just a bunch of blood sucking Commies".

[TEAM_DERRICK]

Heirononymous 09/05/10(Sun)15:00 No. 469
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469

>>467
...As a dreadnought, right? I do not think you understand the humor behind this, good sir. The idea is that the closest thing a Space Marine gets to retirement is becoming so incredibly fucked up all at once he gets sealed in a dreadnought chassis. However, the rest holds water.

"The Chapter Master of the Adeptus Astartes Retirement Platoon is an old venerable dreadnought named Walt Grayskull, so named because his chassis' legs are green, the torso is a taupe blue, and the articulated head... is just gray. He wields a massive weapon that consists of a storm bolder worked into a wooden stock milled from a tree, and uses it for both ranged and close quarters combat. He doubles as a chaplain because whenever he goes into battle, he chants racist remarks and insults against the enemy that damages enemy morale and bolsters the spirits of his fellow 'noughts.

"Walt Grayskull gets bonuses when fighting non-human forces such as Orks (GODDAMN THUGS), Tyranids (FUCKING PESTS), and Chaos (PUNKASS DRAFT-DODGERS). However, he does have a weakness against Necrons (I FUCKING HATE COMPUTERS!). Lastly, he has a larger bonus against Tau (GODDAMN ZIPPERHEADS!): after slaying them, he can create defensive emplacements by stacking the bodies like sandbags."

[Myrdraxxis]

BAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Razgat]

I don't even play this game, and I think it's funny.

[Major Xeno]

Hmmm.... Might Clint Eastwood be better? Or...wait... speacial hero : Gunnery Sergeant Hartman!

"FUCKING BLUE-ASS COMMIES! WHAT, RED WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?!"

[TEAM_DERRICK]

Hahahaha!

[Major Xeno]

I got more for ya:

Chaos: "YOUNG PUNKS! STOP WAKING ME UP WITH YOUR DAMN EMO CRUSADES!"

Tau: "LOOK! MORE JEJOVAH'S WITNESSES! DAMN YOU, I DON'T WANT ANY PART OF YOUR GREATER GOOD!"

Tau2: "NO I DON'T WANT TO BUY YOUR 'GREATER GOOD' COOKIES! NOW GIT OFF MY LAWN!"

Nids: "HAHAHA! DID SOMEONE CALL FOR THE EXTERMINATOR? EAT NAPALM YOU COCKROACHES/BUGGERS/BUGS!"
The "bugs" was a shout-out to Starship Troopers.

Orks: "U WANT MOAR DAKKA? I GOT YOUR MORE DAKKA RIGHT HERE YOU GREEN-SKINNED PUNK!"

Slaaneshi Cultist: "OH NO, NOT YOU FUCKING ADDICTS AGAIN! I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASSES FOR STEALING MY RHINO/LAND RAIDER!"

Necrons: "FINALLY! A COMPUTER I CAN SMASH WITHOUT GETTING IN SHIT WITH THE MARTIANS!"

[TEAM_DERRICK]

i'm posting that on /777/
good job