Lucco's guide to women: relations and otherwise

[TEAM_DERRICK]

Alright.... Am I really writting this? Well, yes I suppose I am. Contains here in are the tested and proven true methods of Derrick Alan-Michael Jones Phelps Barthlow Esquire III. Tested on various real women and approved by various people of high stature. This is not a guide to getting laid. No. Far from it. This is a guide to fostering a relationship.
Women, feel free to read this and be amazed at how well I've decoded your brain.

First things first. In order to get a female to notice you, you need to do some research. First, try to find out what she likes. If you don't share common intrests, stop. Seriously, there's nothing worse than trying to fake intrest during a conversation.

If you think that the girl is already expressing interest in you, then i say go for it.

Yeah, so start engadeing this girl in conversation. Once you feel comfortable enough, ask her out to the movies.

Concerning Gifts:
They need to be within your budget but not cheap. Say if you have $30. Spend all of those $30. Don't say, "Hey, I can save $14 if i buy this."
It isnt about the price of the gift, it's about the quality. Price is directly proportional to the quality of an item.

Also, don't give this gift if you expect to get something back. Thats not a gift, thats a bribe. Gifts are simply ment to show affection or, at least, that you are thinking of them.

Dates:
Ask as many questions about them as possible. Not so much for the information (although it does help to retain the subject matter), but rather so the person may talk about herself. People love to talk about themselves, and by showing interest in them it shows that you're genuenly into them. Also, if you keep your personal details to a minimum, it builds an aura of mystery around you. Chicks dig that stuff.

I'll type more tomarrow.

Also, never go out of your league. Unless you know that you can pull it off.

[TEAM_DERRICK]

what is this? I don't even?

[Razgat]

When I saw the title, I thought it was going to be a joke, but........dang

[Monika]

When I saw the title, I couldn't believe that one so thoroughly corrupted by the Internet and my former nemesis was giving relationship advice. And then I read it. And I was mildly shocked. And then I laughed. A lot of this is common sense, really, but no man normally seems to think about it.

[TEAM_DERRICK]

i think i was drunk when i wrote this... But i don't drink...
Whoa

[Myrdraxxis]

*facepalm*

[TEAM_DERRICK]

yeah. i was certainly intoxicated on something.

Hell, I'm going to finish it though.

[Mizagium]

Something did not have that to say…. It has, really, to write this has? The fact that, it and my acceptance is here, indicated Arran Michael Jones of his tower of the choir of Ith Phelps Barthlow S of the proofs of that the true ways he proves and they many the types truths he sig.re, III level, than control and approve many types the team of employees, the end to hardly cover. With this to have, is not with the manual of the material of the case. Then they have said to alcangar directly. It is with the manual of the promotion in the connection. The women had read this, surprised that very good with I' and the liberations that were the movements; 5. decode of the brain. First material? It was. So that the woman receives more discovers, he is search necessarily in controls in the first place the attempt, than gradice. don' T, public of intrests the apprehension, than is divided. Ernst, there' But situation S does not control the interest a little millesima of the forges, if the argument is false. If the girl thinks that its interest is represented, therefore I go, I said to him. Engadeing knows the argument in the girl, from whom that one it now receives the loaded totally comfortable beginning if therefore through the movements, the end to the film. In the present: Those protect have the interior the small one who asked to the advantage. Approximately $30 atendimentos. Use $30 all this. Don' " calls T; An end, if I buy this.", conserves $14 is possible; It did not repair to the present and the price it' in this argument; In quality S. the price is proportional to write a quality. Later don' Thus for T that you think it, the end to pay, is this current of the product all. The present, is not, that is mún payment. The present secondly, creates the lies to him of the love what the video with the instruction or, its excessive one passed at least this. Date: The possible execution of the way is similar in this much demand in the connection. Therefore information (the aid in the forward-in-inclination ingualmente is used, but), therefore possibly, beyond which you represented for the team of employees. The interests of that one had said to the material of the visualization of the person you' this use with the introduction; Still Genuenly in the pasts. Later if the detail for the objective determination in is used the small amount more, this secret of the atmosphere of the very neighboring construction. The hen excavates these in the substances first of the first place.

[TEAM_DERRICK]

lol wat

[TEAM_DERRICK]

So now that you've got your lady friend totally in love with you, its now time to move on to the next step.

Preparing your Basement:

First, find a nice soft part of the basement floor and just start picking at it. After a while, you should have a nice hole which will serve as our starting point for our tunnel. Using your pick ax, try to get as much coverage as possible. If dirt begins to fall from overhead, stop. Reinforce your tunnel with 2x8 wooden boards and fix large pieces of sheet metal to the walls. After tunneling out about 20 feet prepare your antechamber. Coat the floors in a fine poly resin to ensure that it stays clean. Now that our dungeon is complete, you need to lure your girlfriend down there.

Once you've locked her in there, all you need to do now is wait. After just a few weeks, she will be completely insane. Then you can use her to do whatever you fucking want. I'd use her to rob banks or something, but i dunno.






What the hell am i writing?

[TEAM_DERRICK]

yeah, I'm taking suggestions as to what the next chapter will be

[Myrdraxxis]

lol that last one was the best idea ever!

[TEAM_DERRICK]

PM your suggestions

[Calefrun]

Dec 31, 2009 17:35:56 GMT -5 Mizagium said:

Something did not have that to say…. It has, really, to write this has? The fact that, it and my acceptance is here, indicated Arran Michael Jones of his tower of the choir of Ith Phelps Barthlow S of the proofs of that the true ways he proves and they many the types truths he sig.re, III level, than control and approve many types the team of employees, the end to hardly cover. With this to have, is not with the manual of the material of the case. Then they have said to alcangar directly. It is with the manual of the promotion in the connection. The women had read this, surprised that very good with I' and the liberations that were the movements; 5. decode of the brain. First material? It was. So that the woman receives more discovers, he is search necessarily in controls in the first place the attempt, than gradice. don' T, public of intrests the apprehension, than is divided. Ernst, there' But situation S does not control the interest a little millesima of the forges, if the argument is false. If the girl thinks that its interest is represented, therefore I go, I said to him. Engadeing knows the argument in the girl, from whom that one it now receives the loaded totally comfortable beginning if therefore through the movements, the end to the film. In the present: Those protect have the interior the small one who asked to the advantage. Approximately $30 atendimentos. Use $30 all this. Don' " calls T; An end, if I buy this.", conserves $14 is possible; It did not repair to the present and the price it' in this argument; In quality S. the price is proportional to write a quality. Later don' Thus for T that you think it, the end to pay, is this current of the product all. The present, is not, that is mún payment. The present secondly, creates the lies to him of the love what the video with the instruction or, its excessive one passed at least this. Date: The possible execution of the way is similar in this much demand in the connection. Therefore information (the aid in the forward-in-inclination ingualmente is used, but), therefore possibly, beyond which you represented for the team of employees. The interests of that one had said to the material of the visualization of the person you' this use with the introduction; Still Genuenly in the pasts. Later if the detail for the objective determination in is used the small amount more, this secret of the atmosphere of the very neighboring construction. The hen excavates these in the substances first of the first place.

I c wat u did thar

[Myrdraxxis]

I don't....

[TEAM_DERRICK]

translation party

[Calefrun]

Or that other thing he found a few days ago

[thecheat]

Dec 30, 2009 21:56:08 GMT -5 TEAM_DERRICK said:

Alright.... Am I really writting this? Well, yes I suppose I am. Contains here in are the tested and proven true methods of Derrick Alan-Michael Jones Phelps Barthlow Esquire III. Tested on various real women and approved by various people of high stature. This is not a guide to getting laid. No. Far from it. This is a guide to fostering a relationship.
Women, feel free to read this and be amazed at how well I've decoded your brain.

First things first. In order to get a female to notice you, you need to do some research. First, try to find out what she likes. If you don't share common intrests, stop. Seriously, there's nothing worse than trying to fake intrest during a conversation.

If you think that the girl is already expressing interest in you, then i say go for it.

Yeah, so start engadeing this girl in conversation. Once you feel comfortable enough, ask her out to the movies.

Concerning Gifts:
They need to be within your budget but not cheap. Say if you have $30. Spend all of those $30. Don't say, "Hey, I can save $14 if i buy this."
It isnt about the price of the gift, it's about the quality. Price is directly proportional to the quality of an item.

Also, don't give this gift if you expect to get something back. Thats not a gift, thats a bribe. Gifts are simply ment to show affection or, at least, that you are thinking of them.

Dates:
Ask as many questions about them as possible. Not so much for the information (although it does help to retain the subject matter), but rather so the person may talk about herself. People love to talk about themselves, and by showing interest in them it shows that you're genuenly into them. Also, if you keep your personal details to a minimum, it builds an aura of mystery around you. Chicks dig that stuff.

I'll type more tomarrow.

Also, never go out of your league. Unless you know that you can pull it off.

70% wrong. I've seen Derrick try to flirt, and he just ends up yelling at people. Usually the girl.

If you ask only questions, it makes you seem like you have no personality. You come off as a puppy dog and get stuck in the friend zone. The PROPER strategy is the bust out the swagga, and confidence her off her feet and into the bedroom. Confidence is a verb.

Presents are also for puppy dogs. Save them for birthdays and holidays that make the socially awkward and painfully single cry. And just because, if you're that kind of romantic shit, but not during the initial dating process. Unless it's something charmingly simple, like a flower. Or a balloon flower. I've been known to give out balloon flowers to my lady friends.

Having an aura of mystery only works on a screen. Don't drink down that Hollywood backwash. Tell some interesting/funny stories about yourself. If you don't have any, I suggest you go make some up, unless you're a good liar. And lying is a gamble, because she might discover you later. It's a better plan to just make yourself interesting (if you aren't already).

Derrick is very confused. Unban him so he can see the error of his ways.

[thecheat]

[Calefrun]

Jan 17, 2010 0:04:13 GMT -5 thecheat said:

Dec 30, 2009 21:56:08 GMT -5 TEAM_DERRICK said:

Alright.... Am I really writting this? Well, yes I suppose I am. Contains here in are the tested and proven true methods of Derrick Alan-Michael Jones Phelps Barthlow Esquire III. Tested on various real women and approved by various people of high stature. This is not a guide to getting laid. No. Far from it. This is a guide to fostering a relationship.
Women, feel free to read this and be amazed at how well I've decoded your brain.

First things first. In order to get a female to notice you, you need to do some research. First, try to find out what she likes. If you don't share common intrests, stop. Seriously, there's nothing worse than trying to fake intrest during a conversation.

If you think that the girl is already expressing interest in you, then i say go for it.

Yeah, so start engadeing this girl in conversation. Once you feel comfortable enough, ask her out to the movies.

Concerning Gifts:
They need to be within your budget but not cheap. Say if you have $30. Spend all of those $30. Don't say, "Hey, I can save $14 if i buy this."
It isnt about the price of the gift, it's about the quality. Price is directly proportional to the quality of an item.

Also, don't give this gift if you expect to get something back. Thats not a gift, thats a bribe. Gifts are simply ment to show affection or, at least, that you are thinking of them.

Dates:
Ask as many questions about them as possible. Not so much for the information (although it does help to retain the subject matter), but rather so the person may talk about herself. People love to talk about themselves, and by showing interest in them it shows that you're genuenly into them. Also, if you keep your personal details to a minimum, it builds an aura of mystery around you. Chicks dig that stuff.

I'll type more tomarrow.

Also, never go out of your league. Unless you know that you can pull it off.

70% wrong. I've seen Derrick try to flirt, and he just ends up yelling at people. Usually the girl.

If you ask only questions, it makes you seem like you have no personality. You come off as a puppy dog and get stuck in the friend zone. The PROPER strategy is the bust out the swagga, and confidence her off her feet and into the bedroom. Confidence is a verb.

being stuck in the friend zone is not a fun thing to be, but unfortunately some people lack the ability to confidence

Jan 17, 2010 0:04:13 GMT -5 thecheat said:

Derrick is very confused. Unban him so he can see the error of his ways.

Lol he got banned cuz he abused his powers... not that he's never done it before, but this time he did it at Tyler.