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Post by Mizagium on Mar 31, 2011 22:08:13 GMT -5
MAF SHRUGGED, SENDING RIPPLES OF COOLNESS BACKWARD THROUGH SPACETIME. "T'WASN'T ON PURPOSE, DAWG. THINGS JUST HAPPEN. DIDN'T MEAN NOTHING BY IT."
~~~~~
The Crossmen watched as Zais materialized his stuff inside Awesome Land and an army of Shadow Soldiers swept over the countryside. Again.
Jace blinked. "Well, shit."
Torran sighed. "I know how to handle these guys."
"Really?" Sherri demanded. "How?"
"You cut the heads off and they die."
~~~~~
Stella, disregarding whatever she was doing, noticed the army of darkness. "Hooray its time for more plot to happen maybe I hope!" She and her UFO zoomed off and chased a Shadow soldier, who smartly ran in fear, around a tree.
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Post by Calefrun on Mar 31, 2011 22:11:08 GMT -5
The MCF, wanting no more to do with this strange man who did everything in capital letters, also began wandering in the direction of the Shadow Soldiers.
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 10, 2011 20:19:19 GMT -5
MAF TOOK SEVERAL MANLY STRIDES TOWARD THE MCF AND THREW HIS ARM AROUND HIS SHOULDER. "WHOA BUDDY, WHAT'S THE HURRY? WE HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN DRUNK YET."
~~~~~
Blanche closed in on Dynasty City.
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Post by Calefrun on Apr 10, 2011 20:41:57 GMT -5
The MCF wasn't sure what to do. He could go for a drink, but he was a bit underage, and this MAF guy creeped him out. Plus, there was plot happening. Or something. Knowing that this man would not let him go so easily, he sighed and said, "Okay, one drink. Then I'm going to go find out what the fiz is going on over there."
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 10, 2011 20:53:56 GMT -5
"AW YEAH! LET'S DO THIS." THE MAF STEERED THE MCF TOWARD THE BAR. AND BY STEERED I MEAN HE CARRIED HIM UNDER ON ARM AND ONLY SET HIM DOWN ONCE THEY WERE AT THE BAR. "BARKKEP, I WOULD LIKE A TANKARD OF YOUR FINEST."
THE MAN BLINKED. "FINEST WHAT? ACTUALLY, BETTER QUESTION, A TANKARD?"
"YES."
~~~~~
Stella finished her handiwork. She had captured the Shadow Soldier and planted him in the ground up to his neck. "There now," she singsonged as she sprinkled water over its head. "I'm sure one day you'll grow up to be big and strong."
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Post by Razgat on Apr 10, 2011 22:37:11 GMT -5
Not far away from the two mysterious men ordering at the bar sat a small framed figure. She was along at a table watching them, sipping at a glass of milk, for she was too young to drink. A scene like that would have seemed only slightly strange if it weren't for the fact that she had a small hood over her face, which was completely bandaged save for her left eye and parts of her hair. She had a long straw that went underneath the bandages and into her mouth, allowing her to drink without being seen. Aside from that, her body was mostly covered and barely showed any skin aside from her forearms and part of her thigh that stuck out of the slit in her dress.
She sat, just staring at the men, with her elbows on the table and her hands on her cheeks. She didn't say a word.
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Post by Myrdraxxis on Apr 10, 2011 22:45:52 GMT -5
"Okay men!" Zais said cheerfully. "Status report." Sindri stepped forward.
"My lord. Our forces have set up barracks at the designated outposts. We have contacted the Empress to let her know that we just brought an entire army of potentially dangerous shadow beings to take up residence as a standing army. All forces are accounted for...except for trooper Bravo 36." Sindri frowned.
"Where could he have gone?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
"Sweet merciful darkness, someone get her off of me!" The poor trooper that Stella was harassing bellowed pitifully. It was rather chilling, seeing as emulating a natural human emotion was hard underneath the soldier's mask. But somehow he managed it perfectly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And that's what happened." Myrxxan said. Dace was, quite frankly, ready to beat his head against his desk. In fact, the man discovered that he was in fact doing so, and had been from the moment Myrxxan had said "Zais is the new Secretary of Homeland Defense."
"Is he going to be okay?" Azzi asked the members of Vanguard. He had decided to tag along. After all, if he wanted to fulfill his new lifelong dream of being a Vampire-ninja-dragon rider-father-mage-DCI agent, he needed to experience it.
"Yeah...I think." Viper said.
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 10, 2011 22:52:34 GMT -5
"K bai!" Stella hopped back onto her UFO and fluttered away, leaving the poor Shadow Trooper to hopefully become a tree. Seconds later, the ceiling of the bar exploded in a small area as Stella appeared through the hole.
"This place looks like fun." She spotted the MAF. "I will call you...Shiny 2, because the guy who hangs around with Miss Lady is Shiny 1!"
MAF WAS SPEECHLESS. "I AM SCARED OF HER."
Stella flipped upside down on her UFO and spotted the Mysterious Bandaged Figure. "Oh, and you will be Other Lady, kay?"
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Post by Razgat on Apr 10, 2011 23:00:00 GMT -5
MBF raised an eyebrow. She hadn't said anything to anyone, nor had she even acknowledged that she would be with the apparent group. "Excuse me?"
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 10, 2011 23:31:39 GMT -5
"Yep. Since there's already a Lady, you have to be Other Lady. All my other names are stupid, like Bandagey, and...well, that's all I got around to." The UFO continued to hover in the air, with Stell sitting on the underside, hanging upside down.
THE MAF SAT AT THE BAR AND DUMPED THE TANKARD OF THE BEST INTO HIS HELMET. "THIS IS GOING TO GET WEIRD I CAN TELL."
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Post by Razgat on Apr 10, 2011 23:35:22 GMT -5
MBF scooted back in her chair a bit. "I'm sorry, I don't know who you are."
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 10, 2011 23:42:19 GMT -5
Stella dropped off the UFO ans struck a heroic pose. "Stella the Space Ninja!" to demonstrate her prowess, she hurled a handful of neon shurikens to her left, which smashed through the window and kept going. Then she drew her neon katana and sliced the bar in half, making everyone's drinks slide down into the gap. "Tadah!"
~~~~~
Outside, the shurikens caught Torran by surprise and effectively nailed him to the wall.
"Need some help?" Sherri asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Nah, I'm good." He promptly dozed off.
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Post by Razgat on Apr 10, 2011 23:51:59 GMT -5
MBF gazed wide eyed at the damage Stella had caused. "And this is just within the first few seconds of meeting her?" MBF thought to herself. "These people are crazy, and now she's grouping me with them. Do I really want to be with these people?"
MBF nodded. "Ok, Stella. Need an extra hand?"
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 11, 2011 8:36:53 GMT -5
Stella paused in the middle of decapitating a barstool. "Extra hand with what?"
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Post by Monika on Apr 11, 2011 14:43:48 GMT -5
"Oh my..." Chancellor Awesome watched as Zais' forces invaded took up their new position in Awesome Land. He had no idea what he should do, but assumed that telling Aurora about it would be as helpful as trying to stop them himself. "It really isn't a good idea to- " he began muttering to himself.
"Isn't it great having all these new soldiers in Awesome Land, Chancellor?" Aurora fluttered up beside C. Awesome as he slapped his hand against his face. "Making Zais our new Homeland Security chief was a brilliant idea, if I do say so myself."
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Somewhere, far, far away, a harsh chill swept over Leon. "Aurora's done something very, very stupid..." he sighed. "Oh well. No skin off my back. It's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday..." He was partying in a dimension of eternal sunlight on the coolest beach ever with a bunch of scantily clad women, completely unconcerned about the fate of his former empire.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chancellor Awesome didn't respond, instead groaning quietly in despair.
"Filled a vacant position, had a nice carnival, got rid of an annoying clown...Now all that could make this day better is getting rid of that blasted supernova." Aurora muttered. It was perplexing...It was relatively dark across Awesome Land, a sign of dusk approaching, but the large explosion from the detonating Kraken brain was still illuminating a small portion of the sky.
Chancellor Awesome looked up from his hand and noticed the light, just as confused. "That is quite odd, Aurora. But, seeing as this is Awesome Land and you are an accomplished dark sorceress, I see no reason why you can't just...cast it away." he reasoned. If it could be called reason. If anything in Awesome Land could be called reason.
"Good point. No wonder I hired you as my advisor!" Aurora cheered, raising her sceptre in the air and pointing it at the source of light.
One of your better decisions, clearly. C. Awesome thought.
"Alright, now how did Leon do this again? Hmm..." Aurora closed her eyes and concentrated intently on getting rid of the supernova. Side effects of her concentration included massive winds rushing across the city and violent tremors destroying what buildings still stood. Slowly, a ball of 100% Grade S Concentrated Darkness materialized above her. Chancellor Awesome looked up at the ball in an expression that could either be fear or surprise. Maybe fearprise.
"This should do it. Here goes nothing. Ha!" Aurora thrust her sceptre into the air, prompting the ball of dark energy to fly straight toward the supernova. With her superhuman eyesight, she was somehow able to see it travel all the way into space as it collided with the light. "A direct hit!"
"Excellent, Aurora. Now, let's all go home and discuss why you hired Z-" Chancellor Awesome stopped before he could finish, noticing that Aurora was staring wide eyed at the sky. "Is everything alright, Aurora?"
"Chancellor, do what I did just now, please."
"Pardon?"
"I need you to fire a ball of energy up into the sky toward the supernova...NOW." Once again, with her super sight, Aurora noticed that the ball of darkness was flying directly toward Dynasty City.
"Yes, Your Majesty!" Chancellor Awesome repeated Aurora's actions, using Awesome Land's four pillars to send a large ball of energy toward the supernova. Very high in the sky, Chancellor Awesome's elemental energy collided with Aurora's dark energy. Instead of cancelling each other out, each ball shattered into hundreds of thousands of smaller ones, all traveling toward Dynasty City. It was now raining BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS of highly destructive energy.
"Well, that didn't work." Aurora pouted.
"Obviously." Chancellor Awesome agreed. "Shall I set up a barrier to protect the city?"
"Eh, the citizens can worry about themselves. Besides, if you set up the barrier, you'll be stuck here maintaining it, and you have to come with me."
"Pardon? What for, Aurora?"
"That supernova is clearly impervious to our magic, meaning it poses a great threat to Awesome Land. There is only one way to stop it, Chancellor."
"You don't mean-
"We need to find...the Scrolls of Science."
Someone, somewhere, had his head asplode as Aurora and the chancellor skipped off to find Bill Nye.
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Post by Razgat on Apr 11, 2011 15:00:51 GMT -5
"Um...you guys are a group, right?" MBF crossed her arms and sat back in her chair.
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 11, 2011 15:10:51 GMT -5
Stella sat atop the ruined bar, whittling away at a piece of wood with her katana. "Hmmmmmmmmmm I dunno. Wanne be a group? We can think of a super cool awesome fun name!"
MAF SLAMMED BOTH ARMORED FISTS ONTO THE REMAINS OF THE BAR, CAUSING IT TO SHATTER EVEN FURTHER. "AW YEAH, THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE GREATEST IDEA THAT I EVER HEARD SINCE I DECIDED TO GET DRUNK WITH THIS GUY." HE SLAPPED THE MCF ON THE BACK MANLY.
~~~~~
The other Crossmen had succeeded in peeling Torran off of the wall, leaving pieces of fabric and skin behind in a rather nice outline of the DCI member.
"Great," Sherri muttered. "Now its raining balls of darkness."
Jace frowned. "I guess we should do something, right?"
Everyone waited expectantly, surprised that their squad leader was taking initiative -
"Let's go see what Dace wants us to do."
They groaned.
...
They sort of just burst through the door without warning. "Hey, boss. It's raining darkness out there. What should we do?"
Ara was still in a state of absolute denial in his office. "Nothing," he said with a sick grin, "is happening."
~~~~~
Blanche reappeared a short distance away from the city. She watched as a large sphere of darkness flew away from the city. She followed it as it collided with the supernova-Kraken-brain...and then as it rebounded. And then a seconds dark sphere intercepted the first, and they exploded into thousands of smaller orbs that rained down on the land.
"What."
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Post by Razgat on Apr 11, 2011 15:23:48 GMT -5
MBF stood up from her table and crossed her arms. "Alright. Sounds fun. Who are you?" She glanced at the men.
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Post by Calefrun on Apr 11, 2011 15:47:42 GMT -5
The MCF, annoyed that he couldn't even enjoy a drink without some random event occurring, grumbled, "Call me... Xanthos. And I have no intention of being a part of any sort of group. I only agreed to a drink because I was thirsty and figured this guy wouldn't take no for an answer."
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Post by Mizagium on Apr 11, 2011 15:53:19 GMT -5
"OH NO YOU DON'T!" THAT ALL CAPS EXCLAMATION CAME FROM BOTH STELLA AND THE MAF, WHICH IS WHY ITS IN SMALL CAPS.
The Space Ninja appeared on his left. "You're a part of this group, whether you like it or not."
THE MAF CONTINUED TO SIT ON XANTHOS' RIGHT, SEXILY. "YOU'RE IN IT UNTIL THE BITTER END."
"TEAM SPIRIT, BLAST OFF AT THE SPEED OF FIZ! SURRENDER NOW BECAUSE YOU AIN'T GETTING OUT!"
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